Redd White Learns How To Read

Beginnings

"I can clearly understand that you are comprehensively linguistically challenged. my dear defence attorney.. I see that speaking coherently was not bestowed upon you, Mr. Wrong - So I will attempt to tone down my giantesque vocabulary and converse on your level of discord." Redd White of Bluecorp said bashfully, waving his hands around graciously as if to show off his glimmering rings that decorated each of his fingers, grinning smugly, which was rather bashful in nature.

Maya Fey.

Phoenix Wright glared at the metrosexual milky man who stood before him, Glittering and shimmering like a distant star about to go supernova, ready to kill billions of innocent lives within the span of twenty (the number equivalent to the product of two and ten; ten less than thirty; 20.) seconds. Redd White chuckled, basking in the attention, and watched as Phoenix glared at him. "Mr. White, you killed a guy... or like twelve guys. You're going to jail." Phoenix attempted to humble the absolutely luminarious man but failed.

"Oh, Phoenix. Your understanding is so miniscule. You have absolutely no clue how the real world works. It's a tremendously monumental world out there, trillions of kilometres - billions of miles! and your understanding is so minute... so frivolous. " Redd White smirked, clearly not understanding the leverage of the situation - nor how large the world was, to be honest.
"So you're planning on just standing in front of the court, abd saying that you didn't do it?" Edgeworth interrupted bluntly.

"What? no, no, of course not...! You think I, El Presidente of Bluecorp, is that cretinous?! My plan is simple! simple enough for you two low life cretins to understand.." Redd white said in a rather spanish, alarmingly bashful way- which implied his speech to be rather full of bash.

Phoenix nodded, "Go on.." Edgworth encouraged the bashful traffic cone of a man to continue.

"Well, I'll accuse Pearl Fey and tell the court that she told me to do it...or something along those lines! Marvellous, is it not?" The entire room sighed, other than April May, who was jiggling her massive mommy milkers, amazed at Redd White's brilliant plan.

Phoenix then gasped at the hyperfemme bimbo with the beautiful, bodacious breasts "Hey! This is the dude's bathroom! Shoo, get out!". Redd White sighed and suddenly, but unsuprisingly had unprotected sex with April May right there over the sink, before looking back at the lawyers "It'll work, Trust me, I always do this" he reassured the two. Edgeworth shook his head "You just told a prosecutor and a defence attorney that you did in fact murder tens of people... and how you're going to lie to get out of it.. Do you realise how-" Redd White interrupted "Brilliant.. no, absolutely fantabulous it is??? I know!! Cause now you two can both fight for my innocence together, like one of those homoerotic romance novels with mild implications of pedophilia!" Before the two lawyers could say a word, Redd White sprinted full speed out of the bathroom and into the halls, darting towards the courtroom, almost murdering three innocent people. April closely followed afterwards, but a bit slower, as her enormous bulging breast weighed her down.

Edgeworth looked over to Phoenix and rolled his eyes in an almost joking manner, Phoenix blushed and giggled, doing an exaggerated sigh at the glittering himbo's behaviour. They both made their way to the courtroom. Phoenix jumped into a Mario 3d World type pipe as Edgeworth drove his car, but as opposed to Redd White's previous descent, Edgeworth did, in fact, murder about three people via hit n run while driving through the hallway.

They reached the courtroom (roughly about the same time as Redd White, who had sprinted into a wall and hurt his ankle). The two lawyers noticed something so horrible and disgusting...

"Hello, SON" The shrill voice of Manfred Von Karma rang loudly from the prosecutor stand, Redd White smirked, Glimmering his rings, "see? I told you two non linguistic lawyers I'd find a way..~" He said almost flirtatiously, but slightly pained due to his injured ankle that April may was currently rubbing her breasts on as an attempt at some bizarre alternative religious medicine.