22.

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When I woke up Eric was already up and gone. He left a note saying:
                   Sorry to leave. Max had an emergency. Meet in my office around 11.
                                             -Eric.
I took a quick shower in his bathroom and happily helped myself to one of his clean hoodies before going down to meet Niki and Jacob in the Canteen.

"Hey. Eric keep you over in training?" Jacob asked looking at his watch. It said 6:45 am. I am usually back by this time.

"Yeah. He was trying to teach me a new technique and I couldn't get it so he made me run laps." I lie smoothly.

"Yuck. Well, at least you don't need to do fear sims today." Niki said with a smile.

"Yeah because folding papers for Eric is just as fun." I snarked with a roll of my eye. I hate lying to them but they need to think this is miserable when I love it. 

"Really? Is that what he makes you do?" Ian asked surprised.

"Yeah. I fold old paper work then shred it. And it isn't anything interesting.  It is old food slips and boring stuff like that." I said with a roll of my eyes.

"Sorry to be boring you Flowerpower." Eric said as he placed both of his hands on my shoulder.  I jumped slightly.  I looked up and notices that his arms were bulging from trying to make it look like he was squeezing really hard. But his hands were of course gentle. 

"Well, you did hype this job up and all I do is shred paper." I snide back enjoying the look on their faces as they watched our interactions.

"You have a fucking mouth on you now." Eric snarled down at me as I kept my face turned to him. Something about this was dangerously hot.  I could feel myself grow damp.  No one can tell that the tension between us is sexual.

"You did say you'd beat the Amity out of me.  I guess you did." I snipped trying not to smile because we both know it is the farthest from the truth.

"Well, now I get to make you have an extra training session.  Now." He snarled again and removed his hands from my shoulders.

I glances at my friends and they all looked terrified.  I shot them a pretend worried glance and got up.  I followed Eric out of the canteen and before we got to the training room he pulled me down a small corridor before pushing me against the wall with a hard kiss.

It was a sloppy make out that involved more grabbing each other than anything. Something came over me and I actually grabbed Erics growing length in his pants.  It didn't scare me.  It excited me more.

I am now sitting in his office filing paperwork with a now growing bruise on my neck from the two hickies he had left.  Luckily he made it clear that we were training.  So if I get a bruise they won't question it. I think he just liked knowing that he is leaving me with his marks.  But him marking me as his made me feel special.  Like his.  Even when no one know that I am his but I will think of him everytime I see them.

I looked up when I felt Erics eyes on me.  He has a small smile as he took on my hunched form wrapped in a blanket as I organizes his bottom drawer of his filing cabinet.

"You know if you take a picture it will last longer." I joked as I push a file into the drawer.

"Already did." He said a turned his tablet to me.  He had a picture of me laying on his lap from yesterday. I was reading on my tablet.  I felt myself blush.

"Max will have a field day with how soft Eric Coulter is when it comes to me." I wink as I got up and sat on his lap.

"I would not say soft.  I'd do harm to anyone who does it to you." He said seriously wrapping his arms around me.

"Do you think lov- being involved with me will make you weak?" I asked softly.  This has been something on my mind.

"Will it come with it's challenges? Of course.  But I think caring for people gives you a reason to fight.  Gives you a reason to be a better person and live. Max was competely ruthless before he met Maggie.  He would have killed me and you for our relationship. But Maggie made him change.  They broke up twice and that was because he was a dick but Maggie loves him so much that they never stayed apart for more than two days. They are obsessive and toxic but they have a fierce love.  I never saw a true relationship with any one.  Until you." He whisper as if he was scared to tell me this.

I smiled a kissed him softly.  I am falling for this man every day.  We have only been together 2 weeks but have spent the last almost 6 everyday together.  I don't want to rush the L word.  But I feel like I truly love this man.  I have had boyfriends but I have never felt like what I feel for Eric.

My world begins and ends with him.  He is giving me everything that is thought I lost back. I love myself again, I love hugging MY friends and dancing in the pit on our free time.  I don't mind helping people with their knife throwing because I can actually touch them.  I know when he gets back and after job picking I will be giving myself competely to him.  I want him to be my choice.  I want to replace my father's touch with his.

I want to feel his touch instead of my fathers. I already associate his hands on my hips over my fathers.  I want to feel sour down there and know that Eric was the one who did that. The one who made me hunger for more. 

God, Niki needs to stop reading those books out loud in the bunk because I am sounding like the bools I read when I was younger. I remember reading the first smutty books and learning the power of my own fingers.  I was 16 at the time.  After my father raped me I couldn't even bring myself to even touch myself slightly in that way. But maybe now I can try again. Maybe I can slowly take my power back. Replace his touch with nine. Then maybe with Eric's.

"Hey.  What has your brain all concerned?" Eric asked in a worried tone.

"It is kind of embarrassing." I said with a deep blush.

"Tell me." He said in a soft voice.

"Well, I use to read my mother's romance books when I was a teen and I learned about the power of smutty books. And.. Um. I was just thinking about maybe it is time to take some power back. It has been a while because my PTSD feels his filthy hands.  But I think it is time again." I said nervously not meeting his eyes.

"You do whatever you need to baby girl.  I support you." He said and kissed my cheek.  I felt myself melt.

"You have no clue how much you have saved me" I whisper to him before kissing him.  But a thought popped up in my head.

"Eric.  I need to go over the footage of the last 6 years of Choosing cermomy.  Because I saw your notes that said that the guns started going missing your second year as leader right? Then it would have to be someone in your class or someone who has a big connection to the last few choosing cermomies." I explained and looked through his notes.

"I can get Marlene to look at them and you two can look through them together while I am gone." He said picking up his phone to call Max. I nodded looking at his notes.  He has beautiful handwriting.

"Marlene will bring some of the files tomorrow to our place and help you looked through them. She has to go to Erudite for the rest of them and that might take a few days.." He explained and I just nodded becaus he just called his place our place and I am so excited for our future.

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