Hidden Her

Hidden letters.

HIDDEN letters!

It is an arid night in tropical February, I am covered in a thick blanket believing it's cold at night and I'm sweating like a surface drizzle.

Well! my worry is not about the heat,
I'm struggling to compose a poem that I need to perform at a community event.
Less the people care about it, the more it becomes an interesting job for me.

I'm a poet, and I write lyrics too, none of them are famous enough but if I forced you to read you will drown in the depths of words
that you learned for the first time through my poem.
But I lost that vocabulary for a very long time due to the procrastination being evil of my story, now I live in a broke apartment with my inner spirits that are sunken like dried leaves on fall...
I left home for pursuing poetry, thinking I would be a slam poet. Everyone made fun of me and said are you trying to be
Sarojini Naidu of the 21st century...
Fun has the capability of sicking my nerves. I get these dark vivid dreams which become my muse...

I like the dead poet society and thought that only a dead poet can bring some new to a society...
"Posthumous" powerful word, but I can't kill myself to get famous right?
Priorly, I should have written the classics of mine... like all my self-wrath in different flavors.

Yeah! I sounded like a broke poet, neither the bread nor my friend earned the strength to carry me into the world to present the artistry. I was left like a
poisoned apple after death from one bite.

It's dreadful to forget about all the things I love. They all called me I'm gloomy and then I grew grumpy.
They said I write pathos, that's the part I discover the pain of man in the course of life.

They said I create the scenarios, that's the pun of uncovering the curable vain of man in the pursuit of happiness.

See, my words sound like a never-ending celestial loop of planets around the sun...
Hope the sun rises at my darkened soul.
I need to sleep said my brain to my body...

Then the body awakens from the dream state,
"Oh! It's 10 minutes past 9 am I need to rush to my class, why would I make such huge mistakes not having an alarm".
I screamed.

My friend Neerja, "It's not so late go freshen up we will be able to enter in grace time". With a rushed tone.

"No! I don't think so, it's my stupid sleep that will always get in my way"
I said hesitantly with a high-pitched voice."

"Nah! Nah! Not a time for regretful meetings, we can have a whole night to do it" said Neerja and left the room.

I didn't get ready for class, it's the 3rd day of my surgery clinical postings, topics are interesting but I've little knowledge cause I keep on forgetting the anatomy. Not a bizarre situation, intact everyone has it.
I managed to give 2-3 answers among the 10 questions the professor asked.

There he comes the once-called best companion of my fairy tale, currently, we aren't on good terms. It doesn't matter.
This could be my average day, but here is the slightest cold shoulder from him, not even a greeting. He didn't at least respond to something that I asked for. He does it most of the time, isn't that bad that he behaves like this. Maybe I'm on the wrong note to his senses so he tries to leave me on short notice.

Well well! He's my not-so-close friend
Or once the closest friend.
Maybe I'm not a good person, and he can normally co-exist, He has been great with all people, why does it won't happen to me?  Thinking of all the possible things I crashed at the classroom table, it has been an evening with a starry sky, I should enjoy it, but my neck is looking down but ridiculously high ideas in my mind shine like silica crystals of sand that
tend to shine as rhinestones dropped on cobblestones. As if I misdirected the slightest of disapproval of response into a greater disappointment...