Shift

12. Max

I was killed.

I cursed under my breath, pressing the commands to respawn. My teammates must have been furious with me, and I would normally give up after such a streak of bad luck. Today, however, I really needed the distraction. I was down, so I was bringing everyone on the other side of the internet down with me.

I was killed again, almost instantly after respawning. With a loud roar, I threw the controls against the wall. I didn't even feel bad right afterwards as per usual. I hoped the stupid thing got destroyed beyond repair.

The doorbell rang. Great, now I had to explain to the neighbours that, no, I wasn't torturing anyone in here.

I strode to the door and flung it open.

It was Aiden. He looked at me with a worried frown.

"Everything ok? I dropped by to pick up my stuff and heard somebody scream from downstairs. Was that you?"

"Hm, yeah. I was just frustrated with the game," I mumbled. Last time we were together I was out of my mind drunk, spewing nonsense. I was hoping to make up for that by behaving somewhat more mature in the next opportunity. So much for that. "Come in."

"That sounded like a lot of frustration for a game," he teased, closing the door

Of course, because the problem is not the game, not at all. The problem is that I want you, I want you so bad you wouldn't believe how hard I'm fighting not to kiss you right now. The problem is that I can't stop thinking about you whether I'm awake or asleep, wether I'm alone or fucking some other guy. The problem is that I don't even know what bothers me more: the fact that you are steady with someone else and you look so perfect together, or the fact that you wouldn't look twice in my direction even if that wasn't the case. That's the problem, Aiden.

I said none of that, of course.

"Trouble at work," I mumbled, instead. I hoped he'd drop it at that, but of course Aidan, being the generous, considerate, kindhearted person that he is, he didn't.

"That sucks. Boss or coworkers?"

"A coworker," I said. It was not a complete lie. Jack had been avoiding me since that night, as I should've known would happen. I had managed to ruin what could have been a decent friendship, all because I liked playing games and couldn't keep it in my pants. More points to me.

There was no going around it. After Aiden had picked up all the clothes and hygiene products he'd left behind when he'd stayed over, we sat on the couch with a cup of coffee and I told him everything - well not the sordid details - about what went down with Jack.

"That's tough. But I'm sure he'll come around, as long as you are discreet about it. Sleeping with a coworker is usually not a very good idea."

"Look who's talking!"

He smiled. "I did say 'usually'."

"How's John, by the way?" I only cared about John inasmuch as his well-being would impact Aiden's. Other than that, I didn't even like the guy that much. In every interaction we'd ever had, he'd seemed like quite an unpleasant man. I had no idea why someone like Aiden would favour him.

"He's..." His hesitation stretched for too long, his smile too little. "He's getting better. The doctors say he's going to be fine."

"Good."

Aiden stared at the dark surface of his coffee, pensive.

"I was so scared," he muttered. "Something like that happens... one starts to ponder life in a different way, you know?"

"I can imagine." Where was he going with this?

"John, he... he's proposed to me a lot of times," Aiden confessed. "I said no to all of them."