Random Thoughts.

4 Years

It's been exactly 4 years. Years of forcing myself to forget him. Years of fake loves, fake I love you's. Because of one guy, I forced myself to talk to as many guys that would take me to forget him. Years of searching for him, years of not seeing him, years of not hearing his name, years of not crossing paths with him, years of not seeing his smile.

It only took a quick glance on a busy hallway of a normal school day. That's how fast one guy made me have feelings for him, feelings I thought I would never have the chance to experience, feelings that I thought I didn't deserve to feel.

Exactly 4 years. 4 years since I saw him for the first time at school, 4 years since I knew someone like him existed, 4 years of unknown and confusing feelings, 4 years since I last crossed path with him in the hallways during junior lunch, 4 years since my last quick glance.

Yet, after 4 years. He was still stuck in my mind. 4 Years of not being able to see him, and yet I still have lingering feelings. All those years, I have yet had my very first conversation with him. Amazing how someone could be into someone who they saw only a couple of hours a day, who they did not have any type of interaction, or conversation. Yet, here I am.

4 years of hoping to see him once again.

I love you Richard