How Jungkook Has Fallen

Was It Kooki?

Lilly keeps her arm around you and leads you into your bathroom as you finish explaining. She starts the shower for you, so the water warms up. You sit on the little vanity seat with your head in your hands, crying once more. Lilly takes your hand and pulls you to your feet.

"Let's get you out of these clothes." 

Lilly notices that you are only wearing one of Kooki's T-shirts. She helps you pull it off, but then she notices something else, stops, and looks at you. Lilly already has a good idea of what happened. 

She leads you to the shower, "Wash up, little one. I will bring you clean clothes." 

Lilly returns with clean pj's for you. You remain quiet as you shower, trying to decide how to tell your older sister you are no longer a virgin.

 Lilly gently smiles as you step out of the shower and into the oversized bath towel she holds. Wrapping yourself in the towel, you sheepishly say, "Unnie, please don't be angry with me."

"Sit down, Jelan, and tell me what happened that you think was so stupid." Lilly already has an idea but wants to give you time to tell her.

You sit on the little vanity seat in front of the mirror while she starts to comb and towel dry your hair, just like she would do when you were a tiny child. You hesitate to tell her, but knowing your sister like you do, she probably has already guessed. You start to blush. "Unnie, I, I'm no longer chaste." Blushing profusely, you look up at her, hoping she understands.

Expecting this, Lilly holds you by the shoulders, looks you squarely in the eyes, and asks, "Was it Kooki?"

 Embarrassed, you look up at her and nod as tears fall from your eyes. "I'm so ashamed." 

She places her arms around you in a brief hug and says, "I know you have been waiting for marriage, but there is nothing to be ashamed of, and you're both adults.  I know you both had been drinking, so tell me honestly, did you give yourself to him or . . ." 

Shocked, you look at her, then cast your eyes down, "I."

You hang your head, afraid she will be upset with you. "I wanted to, with him, but we had so much to drink last night. I don't know if he will even remember. I was up and gone before he woke up."

Lilly squeezes you in a warm embrace, and you feel the loss of your mom so profoundly. She reminds you of her in her warm and loving ways. You wrap your arms tightly around her and softly sob.

She gently rubs your back, holding you for a few minutes in silence, then asks, "Are you alright?" Your sobs subsided, and there were now only sniffles and hiccups.

 You shyly say, "It was nothing like I thought it would be." You look up at Lilly, "It hurt a little at first, but he was so sweet and tender to me."

 You blush, remembering, "It was beautiful, Unnie. I had no idea it could be like that."

Tears start to fall again as Lilly pulls you into a tighter embrace. "Little one, I do know how beautiful it can be when it's with the one you love. He must know. If not, I'm sure Hobi will let him know." 

She is done with your hair, and you remove the bath towel and start to put on your pajamas when you panic, "Oh no, please don't tell Oppa."

 Lilly smiles and says, "Don't worry. I won't have him talk to Jungkook, and I don't think Kooki would forget anything like that." 

Lilly winks at you, grinning, "Besides, I think you two are in love and just don't want to admit it."

With hope in your eyes, you ask, "You think so? Because I do have feelings for him. I didn't understand what they were until now." 

 "Yes, I think so." Lilly says, "But you both try to one-up the other." She gently pinches your cheek and says with more love than frustration,  "You two drive me crazy."

You look at her. "Many people see me as a tomboy because I've always been so competitive, and I love beating Jungkook at anything. It gives me a deep sense of satisfaction. I think one of the reasons he annoys me is because he HAS to win at everything, and I feel I can't let him."  

Lilly giggles, as do you. Then you turn serious and tell her, "I'm rough and tumble on the outside, Unnie. I love racing, sports, and working out to stay physically fit. But on the inside, I'm still a girl. I love being a girl, and Unnie, what I shared with Jungkook was mine to give."

With motherly concern, Lilly says, "You know what you gave of yourself you can never get back."

"I gave it along with my heart. I don't want either back."