re connect; eren jaeger

000

summer two years prior
one month before the start of freshman year
through the eyes of Y/n.

I've heard so many rumors that I'm just a girl that you bang on your couch.

My hair sprawled messily across the pillows on my bed. The morning sun shone through the cracks of the off-white curtains letting my room become dimly lit. The sound of birds chirping could be heard from the other side of my window while K by Cigarettes after Sex played quietly from the speaker on my nightstand.

To an outside viewer the scene seemed, peaceful, but looks can be deceiving.

I felt disgusting.

Every part of myself felt like it wasn't me. My breath still tasted of bitter alcohol and I could feel my face covered with dried tears and maraca stains, the left over makeup coated my face making my skin crawl.

Standing up on my feet, I moved to look at my reflection. I grimaced at the sight of myself. My eyes were puffy and red, and the slightly purple hickeys that scattered across my neck made me cringe at my own decisions.

god what was i thinking? what an idiot..

I took a deep breath and covered my face with my hands as my stomach churned. Not only did I feel a headache coming my way, but pressure once again built behind my eyes.

Once I let out the air held in my lungs I walked from my room to my bathroom. I examined my current state again, god what a mess I am. My eyes then moved to the knotted mess of hair on my head before brushing it down. Next, i splashed my face with cold water and washed the remnants of my makeup off before harshly brushing my teeth.

Even after cleaning up I still looked like shit, but after last night I couldn't be perceived any worse. I knew I had to talk to Eren today, even though it was the last thing I wanted.

Back in my room, I put on low rise camp print shorts and a black cropped tank top. I move to my vanity to do my skin care. I don't put any makeup on though, it might sound toxic but deep down I was hoping that the worse I look, the worse he feels in return for making me feel this shitty.

how did i never realize what a dick he is? it's his face, that's definitely it

I tie the laces of my black adidas campus' tightly while sitting at the top of the stair case. My phone constantly buzzed and rang in my hand. I didn't bother checking it, I already knew what all the attention was from. Once again I take in a deep breath, then start my decent down the wooden stairs.

Downstairs on the couch laid Dean, my brother. He must've heard me because as soon as my feet hit the floor he looked back at me. He looked me up and down and very slightly shook his head.

I scoffed and continued to the front door.

"Where are you going?" He shot up from the couch, I ignore him, "Y/n where the fuck are you going?!"

He began walking around the furniture in my direction. "Out," was all I said as his stomps neared. I slammed the door shut behind me as I stepped outside and sped up my walking so when the door opened again I was already at the end of the driveway.

"You better not be going where I think you're going," His voice was loud and angry. He was only a year older than me but he was much more intimidating, "Don't be an idiot!" Was the last thing he shouted.