(TXT FF) You're my celebrity [Soobin ff/Beomgyu ff]

6. heartbreak

'He?' 'Find her?'
Beomgyu was confused so he asked her.

"What are you talking about?"

"I've never told this to anyone but... there is a boy that I love."

She smiled sadly and that was all that was needed to break his already wounded heart into million pieces...he felt like someone pulled out his heart from his chest and all that was left was an empty space. A void.

He knew she'd never like him back, she never gave him any hints that she liked him, he was only a friend to her, she was his support system just like he was hers but even though he knew all that, the pain wasn't any less.

"Why does he have to... to find you?"
His voice cracked.

"He doesn't have to but I hope he finds me someday even if it takes 30 or 40 years...I....uh...."
She was smiling as she said that but a tear slipped from her eye and she wiped it not noticing that Beomgyu also wiped his tears at the same time.

He squeezed her hand trying to console her when he needed it more than her.

"We were best friends since I don't even remember when but he had an ambition and he had to go far away from me to achieve it and uhh he didn't want to leave me but you tell me, how could I sit back and watch him lose the opportunity he had? So I made him promise that if he achieved his dreams I'll wait for him."

"He never came back?" He looked at her. The void in his chest squeezing and sucking his soul each passing minute.

Aera smiled...
"I hope he did but I don't know if he came back or not."

"Huh?"

"I moved...I left everything behind and moved away." She whispered, tears sliding down her cheeks one after another.

"Why would you do that? Did you stop loving him?" He was horrified by her stupidity.

"No silly because I thought I was his weakness and now even if I want to I can't reach him."

"Why?" He was getting frustrated at her.

"Because... I'm afraid now....I don't know if he still wants to find me or not, uh nevermind....the thing is I know that he is happy and healthy and that's all that matters to me." She shrugged nonchalantly.

"Okayy....but you still miss him?" He was intrigued at this point.

"Woah...of course I do. I love him idiot....whenever I baked something for him he'd always say it had a unique taste and even though I knew it was just a silly compliment it made me so happy and you know...I still dream about him, his soft doe eyes glittering with happiness, his smile displaying his perfect teeth...he is like a human bunny. It makes me happy to know that he is where he should be and I don't want to mess things up and take it all away from him. I love him too much to hold him back. I can't be that selfish."

Beomgyu widened his eyes and smiled displaying his teeth and Aera smacked his head and started laughing.
"Oh God! No! I hate you so much, not like that!"

He joined her and they laughed together.

"You can find someone better than him, you know." He mumbled still audible to her.

"What if I don't want to?"

"I...uhhh...okay I don't know how he was as a person but I don't think I would like him, you are crying because of him."
He grumbled and Aera laughed.

"I think you'd love him. Umm....if he was someone you knew he'd be Soobin oppa."
She grinned and Beomgyu rolled his eyes.

"There is no one like Soobin hyung, he is one in the entire world."
Aera laughed once again and nodded her head.

"Is that why hyung is your Bias?"
Aera smiled but was quiet.

Beomgyu acted all curious and excited but deep down it was hurting him, the love her eyes held for that guy shattered his heart into tiny pieces yet again, he felt like his love for her was nothing compared to her love for that guy but no matter how much he tried to understand the situation the pain was unbearable for him. He understood her perfectly well but deep down somewhere he wished that the unknown guy never finds her. He was sure he'd make her happy once again. He'll fill the void of her heart...that is if she ever lets him.

"I guess I should go back and rest." He finally left her hand instantly feeling cold.

"Okay just be safe and take your food and medicines on time."
He smiled and left.
~~~~~~~~~

At night~

His phone lit up with a notification and he yawned as he replied.

Aera: How are you now? Feeling better?

Beomgyu: Of course! You know you are the only medicine that works on me right?

Aera smiled at the text.

Aera: Buttering again? Go to bed now.

Beomgyu: Ah no! I don't think I'll be able to sleep before 2 hours, I feel so fresh.

He typed with another yawn.
They started talking about random things until she asked him something.

Aera: You tell me about your ideal girl type.

Beomgyu: I don't know... I guess loyal, supportive, just someone whom I can lean on and someone who can lean on me, no secrets among us, just someone who can love me for who I'm and someone whom I can love for who she is, she doesn't have to be perfect but she should be real.

He smiled at the text and so did Aera as she read it.

Aera: Why do I feel like you are describing someone?

Beomgyu: Maybe because I'm?

Aera: Woah! Really? Who is she???

Aera got so excited but his reply made her pout.

Beomgyu: I'll tell you when you tell me your name.

He knew she was not going to reveal her name and if by any chance she did, Beomgyu was going to consider it as a sign from the heavens and confess his feelings but of course she simply replied with a 'Gn Gyu <3'

They both went to bed after that. She wouldn't tell him her name and he wouldn't know the name of his love until she revealed it.

Classic!

Beomgyu closed his eyes but his heart was so empty he couldn't sleep.

'I like you or maybe I love you but of course just like TXT and Moa, Moa and I, we can love, support and be connected to each other emotionally but we can't be together physically. Is that why you are just a Moa to me? Because you feel so close yet you are so far away? Or do you have your own reasons?' He closed his eyes and tears dropped from both the corners of his eyes.

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