Plussize life

Chary 1

I stood behind the counter of my bakery, a place where I found solace and comfort amidst the sugary confections and tantalizing aromas.

As a plus-size woman, I had pent most of my life battling insecurities, struggling with self-acceptance, and enduring the harsh criticisms that seemed to follow me like a shadow.

It was a constant reminder that I didn't fit society's conventional standards of beauty.

Despite my reservations about love and relationships, fate had a funny way of stepping in. It was on a particularly busy morning when I first saw him.

He strode into my bakery, his muscular build and chiseled features making heads turn. I could feel my heart race as I watched him approach the counter, my hands growing clammy with nerves.

"Good morning," he said, flashing a bright smile. "Your pastries look amazing. I've heard amazing things about your bakery. Mind if I try one of your famous cinnamon rolls?" he asked with a warm smile."

I managed to find my voice, slightly stammering as I replied, "Of course! Coming right up." My hands trembled as I prepared his order, trying to ignore the butterflies fluttering in my stomach.

I handed him his food, and he thanked me before making his way to a small table by the window.

Over the next few weeks, he became a regular customer. Each morning, he would stroll in, order his usual, and exchange pleasant greetings with me. We began to exchange small talk, and I discovered his name was Ethan.

He was kind, witty, and genuinely interested in getting to know me.

One day, as he paid for his usual assortment of treats, he glanced at me and hesitated for a moment. "Emily, would you like to go out for dinner sometime? There's a new Italian restaurant that just opened up, and I'd love to take you there."

My heart raced, but fear quickly overshadowed the excitement. Memories of past relationships, filled with judgment and heartbreak, resurfaced.

The relentless criticisms about my body size haunted me. I couldn't bear the thought of opening myself up to more pain and rejection

"Thank you, Ethan, but I'm not really interested in dating right now," I replied, trying to mask my unease.

Ethan's face fell slightly, but he remained kind. "That's okay, Emily. Just know that I think you're an amazing woman, and if you ever change your mind, I'll be here."

I thanked him, feeling a mix of relief and disappointment as he left the bakery.

The fear of rejection and the weight of past relationships haunted me. I had been hurt before, my heart shattered by people who couldn't see past my appearance.

The idea of opening myself up again, only to be met with disappointment, seemed unbearable.

Ethan, however, seemed undeterred. He asked me out on a date, not once, but five times. And each time, I found myself rejecting him, offering excuses or diverting the topic.

I couldn't bring myself to say yes, even though a part of me desperately wanted to.

One evening, as I closed up the bakery, my childhood friend, Sarah, stopped by for a visit. She had always been my confidante, the one person who understood my struggles. 

Over a cup of coffee, I poured out my worries to Sarah, telling her about my hesitations and fears of being intimate with someone. She listened attentively, offering me a sympathetic ear and understanding.

"Why won't you give him a chance? You deserve happiness, too. From what you tell me, I think he truly cares about you, and you deserve someone who sees your worth beyond your body size, even though I keep telling you how beautiful you are both inside and out." I gave a fake smile not believing her. 

"Don't let your past dictate your future. Take a chance on him, and remember that you are beautiful just the way you are," Sarah reassured me.

Sarah's words resonated deep within me, and I realized that I had been holding myself back from experiencing happiness and love. With newfound determination, I decided to give Ethan a chance.

The next morning, I prepared myself for Ethan's usual arrival. When he walked through the door, I mustered all the courage I had and approached him.

"Ethan," I said, my voice steadier than I anticipated. "I've thought about it, and I'd love to go on a date with you.. that is if you still want to…I…I know." I was struggling to compose a sentence when I saw a genuine smile lit up his face, and he reached out to hold my hand. "I'm glad you've changed your mind. I've been hoping for this moment." I smiled at him.

Our dates were filled with laughter, shared dreams, and genuine connection.

Ethan never made me feel self-conscious about my body, always complimenting me and my personality. He constantly reassured me that he loved me for who I was, inside and out. But…