Chapter 4
Zayn's POV
It was Friday night, when I finally set myself free from my terrible part time job, all I wanted to do was go home. I live in the campus's accommodations, and it's not half bad. I have a small room for myself, with the space for a small working desk, my bed, a wardrobe and a bathroom. Nothing more than what's necessary, but nothing less too, plus living on the campus gives me the opportunity to sleep as much as possible.
I slammed the door and jumped on my bed, only caring to take of my Converse's. My duvet seemed to hug me and shortly after, my shirt was already laying carelessly on the wooden floor. That night I decided to take a quick nap, and then maybe order a pizza. Once again, my plans failed. That day I couldn’t force my mind to go blank, no matter how tired I was or how matter I wanted to space out.
Every time I closed my eyes the messy blond hair would appear in my mind, but if I tried to simply stare at the ceiling, my brain would replay my conversation with Sara and once again the thoughts about her would dominate me. I urgently needed something to distract me. That night, I spent hours playing PS3 online with my friends from Bradford, reading HQ’s, filling myself with junk food, basically doing whatever it was that needed a minimum of attention. I had been a long time since I spent a night alone in my room, just doing the geek stuff that once filled the biggest part in my life. How much had changed in the last few years was insane. I had changed too, I liked to tell myself it was for the better, but I could never be too sure.
I had no clue on why Sara had made such an impact on me, but I knew that sooner or later I would have to go through that conversation again, to close what I felt for her – I don’t even knew what it was – or to decide I wanted to go further. Surprisingly, I chose sooner.
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I was reading I don’t know what for Literature class, when I spotted someone staring at me. It was quite a surprise when I realized it was Sara. The day she left the store, I was convinced I would never see that girl again, but there she was. An in impulse, I grabbed my things and went over to her. I needed to solve this thing I feel for her as much as I need to solve it now. I tried to break the ice, and she didn’t try to avoid talking to me. I have to admit she seemed really surprised, I don’t know if by the fact I was at Uni or because I talked to her and I tried not to care, but it bothered me in a way to think she sees me just as a “pretty face”.
Refusing my offer to buy her a drink, she found a witty way to make me spill the answers she was so desperate for. I knew I wasn’t the only one intrigued, and the fact that she listened to me, and apparently found really interesting that I take English made me feel better. Maybe I could still show her that I have a decent brain. It’s true she had an odd sense of humor, but I found really amusing to watch her. Her answers were incredibly sharp, despite her fragile looks. Her appearance was something that she obviously intended to avoid talking about, and even though she didn’t mention it, it was clear by her posture that she was insecure about how she looked. Someway we both knew better than to talk about how each other looks, and what comes with it, thankfully.
Our conversation flowed, she wasn't quick to judge as most people I know, and she didn't flirt with me either. It was at the same time good and bad. My ego surely felt a bang for the lack of evident interest, but I also think it was important for me to see that not every girl will be easy. When I think of her, it's not like a feel butterflies on my stomach, but I feel sad to think I might not hear her laugh again. The way she flicks her hair, or the one side dimple she shows sometimes keep me captive. I wanted to make her laugh with me, and at some point I realized I wanted her. It wasn't like I was in love, but I had been lonely for too long, and having someone to cuddle at night, that will be there for me when my world seems to crumble down is something I miss.
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I woke up Saturday on my jeans, way past breakfast time, I must have fell asleep without noticing last night. The TV was on, showing some shitty sitcom I had absolutely no interest in watching, but that I still let on. I called my mom, and talked to her for a long time. Until that moment, it hadn’t hit me how much I miss my family and how much I needed someone to comfort me. I hadn’t been to Bradford in more than a month, and I considered making a quick trip to my hometown the next week, but at the end I decided to go the following week.
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Hi! I know this chapter was a complete filler, but you needed to see a bit of Zayn's POV.
WAY more action coming on the next chapter, including some Zara(?) moments.
Love you all!
~ Lu
