I was the happiest when I got to write my rap verse in the song 'fire', and it somehow turned out to be the truth.
We've been touring for almost half of the year now. Talking about the year, this year, somewhat have been a turbulent year for our team.
Professionally, it's been the best. We've been winning Daesang here and there. We have finally been getting the recognition not only domestically but internationally. But personally, this year had not been the one we anticipated it to be.
I still remember how Coups hyung happily spoiled us having 2 comebacks this year being all happy and giggly, not knowing how he won't be able to participate in one of them.
And the most excruciating one where I almost lost my biggest support for months. My Boo. My kwannie. He has been the support system and hype button for anyone and everyone in our group.
If I have to be honest, Boo has always been the most contagious and brightest person, and it shows in his personality. And whoever he talks to they are just whipped for him in an instant, either it's Peder or Youngji or even his Binnie.
I was a bit jealous of how close Seungkwan and Moonbin were, Their friendship, bond, and whatnot. But I never let it show, although I was a bit threatened and bothered.
But the moment the news broke, the happy, bright Seungkwan we knew shut himself off. He just wasn't the same.
For days, he couldn't process it. Throughout the funeral, he didn't cry, and when he finally wrote the last letter for his memorial, I finally saw him break down. Finally, he cried till he had difficulty breathing. I thought maybe finally Seungkwan would have the closure he needed. But just as I thought he was okay, I was proven wrong.
I still vividly remember he was so out of charterly silent in our boomilly outing.
At night, he kept looking at the stars and moon. Me and the group tried our best to make him laugh and when he finally did we were so relieved but I should have known because just after couple of days, company announced his hiatus due to health reasons.
SVT’s Seungkwan takes hiatus to ‘take the necessary time to rest’
The moment I heard the news, I wanted to run to him, have him in my arms tell him sweet words of encouragement and support.
But whenever I saw him after his doctors appointment or here and there in the building, he would force a smile, but he looked so weak and dull.
It broke my heart.
Then, time after time, he was recovering, and I got busy for the tour.
But I would randomly miss him here and there as I saw his part being performed by someone else.
I missed his 'out of nowhere' stage antiques and BSS shenanigans. How he would turn around during the mansae stage and we would be so close it almost took my breath away.
Those couple of months were painful, but finally, they were gone, and finally Boo was there in the practice room with us.
He was on the phone talking to Coups hyung that if he had been there, he wouldn't have let him get hurt. He hasn't seen me yet but I could see him and couldn't help but smile.
His hair had gotten a bit longer than I remember. He had no makeup on, but he still looked breathtaking. As he faced towards me, ending the phone call, I smiled at him, and he just ran to me and gave me a warm hug.
"I missed you, Bononnie. " He said, his face buried on my chest.
"Ditto." I said regularly, which earned me a small chuckle from him.
"Ditto," He copied, teasingly looking at me.
"And by the way, your hair's a bit long near the ear,you should probably get a trim." He said, ruffling my hair and softly pulling my ear in the process. And I couldn't take it anymore.
This was what I had missed all along him copying me, bickering me to cut my hair, and take vitamins on time. Boo being Boo, Boo being around me by my side.
I pulled his hand in a swift and enveloped him in a hug.
"I missed you so much. Next time if you go on a hiatus, please take me with you."
His laughter vibrated through my chest as his face was buried there, and a muffled
"Sure, my dear Hansollie, "
was all seungkwan could reply.
Throughout the practice, everyone came to Seungkwan and asked him how he was doing. Even hoshi hyung told him to do little by little at a time and not to stress out too much, to which he nodded happily.
Jeonghan hyung almost never left his side. When the practice ended, I finally got my time with my Boo.
"Wanna go to the café with me? I'll buy you your favourite pastery and iced americano, if you like?"
Seungkwan just tugged my ear again, habit of his, then his hand slided to cup my cheek. He looked into my eyes with a smile and proceeded to thank me.
"Thank you, Bononnie." And my heart did a slumber sault because of it.
We reached the cafeteria, I ordered our drink and took a seat. As we talked, our eyes lingered to the window, and we could see Jeonghan hyung busy on the phone when he was finally off the phone, He was talking to the manager and was hurried to the van.
"Hyung told me he was going to visit Coups hyung at the hospital. He couldn't sleep last night properly. He wanted to be there at the hospital for the surgery, but being night time, the hospital said it didn't take visitors, and only family members could stay. So, he had to stay out in the dorm with me, and I could see him pacing and not sleeping throughout the night."
Seungkwan concluded.
" It must be hard for hyung though. He got his roommate back, but now his s/o have to go to hiatus for a while. I kind of understand how much painful and longing it must be for him as I went through almost the same when you were not ....."
The sentence was not finished as Hansol realized what he had said.
His ears were turning red, but so was Seungkwan's cheek.
All Seungkwan did was cleared his throat and whispered,
" Pastery is quite good today."
He couldn't help but blush as he has indirectly made a rare confession. He couldn't hide his smile as he could see the blood rush on Seungkwan's cheekbone as he was not denying what Vernon had said. Both of them smiled ear to ear.
But at the other end was Jeonghan, who was not only feeling worried for Coups but also a bit guilty for something he did throughout the week. And even before he could say anything or clear out anything, the accident happened, and then tour and then the nana tour. When he finally returned from all the touring and all and saw him in the bbq place having meal alone, he went there in the hope of them talking and having spent time together but all he did was greet him to have a good day.
All Jeonghan could do was be dumbfounded, but he said nothing at the lack of Seungcheol's empathy towards him. He just gave him a tight smile and left from there.
But deep inside, he knew he had to make things right between themselves or else he won't be able to function properly.
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You might already have the idea of who Part 2 will be about.
