My name is Katherine but people who I am close
to get to call me Katerina. 6 years ago today December 4th, 2017 I was pregnant with my first child. She was so beautiful. But like most family's my father hated the fact I was carrying a child. He wanted me to get an abortion but mother insisted that I carry and give birth to her. My father was ashamed of me for bearing a child before marriage. So he waited till I give birth to take her away from me. I didn't even get to hold her. He said that it was better for the both of us to never see each other again. Then he took her away...December 4, 2017 :
"Ahhhh, AHHHH " I scream while giving birth." one more, one more push Katerina." my mother says.
" AHHHHH" i scream while pushing out the baby. The baby comes out crying. " It's a girl."
"a girl?" I say while catching my breath ." please. mother, let me see her." She tried giving her to me but my father stops her. " what are you doing?" My father snatches the baby from her hands.
"Let me at least hold her once. Just once. at least once" I beg.
" Forget it. You have disgraced this family Katerina!" My father says. " Father, please!" "tatko, molya te ne, NE" (Father please No, NO!) I scream.
" po-dobre e za neya Katrin, po-dobre e!"(it's better for her Katherine, it's better!) My mother looks at me and says.
" You have to let her go baby, please baby just let her go."
" bez maĭka molya." (No, mother please) I cry. " Tryabva da ya pusnesh, pusni ya Katerina." (You have to let her go, let her go Katerina.) My voice cracks.
" molya te, mamo molya te." (please, mama please )" I beg . " No, I'm sorry Katerina." My mother says as my father took her away.
That day I knew then that I had lost my way. I lost my love for everyone . I don't really know what love is anymore . I don't even know what trust is.
How can people claim they love you one minute of your life then the next minute their taking away something you learned to love?
What is the importance of marriage anyway? What's the point of getting married if I'm never going to be happy? I don't have a strong believe in marriage.
I don't care about getting married in a fancy place with a big white dress with food and people. It's just not for me...I never really had anytime to enjoy myself so when I did I ended up getting pregnant. That's what happens when you try to hide your child from the outside world.
Growing up my father would kill any boyfriend or male friend that had gotten to close to me. So I never really had any guy friends. I barley go outside every now & then but my father makes sure to I have someone to come with me making sure I'm not talking to any men. I hate it.
But my father insisted. My family is the 2nd biggest mafia family in the world. That's why my father believes that I'm always in danger. I have 3 brothers and 2 sisters. They're all married. And they all had moved on from this family. I'm the only one in the family who hasn't gotten married and had a child yet...
10 years ago I met a girl name Natalia she's my best friend. We met at this family event my father hosted. Her father worked for my father. We used to practice throwing knifes & shooting guns together. Those were the good times . I barley get to see her now after my father told everyone what I had done to this family he wouldn't let me see her for 2 years...
I'm 23 years old now and I planned on moving out after getting married. I wanted to save up to buy a beautiful condo apartment. But it seems like my father has other plans...