Tristan's Pov

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(Na)J- above is pic of the male school uniform, or what I kind of imagined it to be.


Tristan thoughts were scattered, between football and the pending start of his junior year. He didn't know if he was getting the job he's been wanting all summer, but if his interview had anything to say about it, the chance was slim. Maybe he talk to Max see if she can get some dirt on that carney old man that runs the old antique shop.

Its ok, I know what you're thinking. A teenage guy working at an antique store. As odd as it sounds the place holds captive some of my greatest memories. My mom, before the accident, would drag me along to pick out a new trinket to hang on the wall or place on the shelf, even gift to one of my aunts. And sometimes she would make up stories for each trinket that sounded so real it was as if she had been there for its making.

We would spend all day in that shop, I think I learned more history through my mom and the shop than I ever did in class.

Hearing the horn of the school bus, notifying him that it was in fact in front of his house. Tristan sighed and grabbed his bag. Mumbling that he should get a car, so he didn't have to ride that dingy old bus. Seriously it smelled like someone sundried moldy socks in the windows, with the added stench of a bus full of teenage hormones. It's safe to say you don't come out that stench mobile cleaner or healthier.

Everyone got off the bus as soon as possible coughing and hacking up their breakfast. One would think we have a stomach virus, they're probably not far off.

We would call it the –DSV- (aka the Deadly Stench Virus).

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I always feel uncomfortable walking through the parking lot to the school, noticing the stares and the flirtatious smiles, and the jealous looks of the other guys. Well one would argue that they were ( I wanna ruin that face ) or ( give me your secrets) look on their faces, either one would make for a less than ideal conversation.

I wouldn't say I was the hottest guy in school, but I definitely wasn't lacking in the looks department. After I started high school it proved to be a pain in the butt than an asset.

I swear I haven't had one day in school where I could just do my work, talk to my friends, and go home. Every single day someone walks up and tries to make a pass on me. Didn't they realize that I wasn't interested in walking makeup sticks with clothes that left little for the imagination.

I was almost to my locker when the first stick came up to me.

Oh no! Why why why why.

Great the first encounter happens to be the schools resident mean girl, every guy wanted to date her every girl wanted to be her, but I didn't get it she was the queen of cakey makeup and tiny clothes. I mean did she buy her clothes in the children's section. Seriously if that skirt was any shorter it would be a bathing suit.

" Tristan, your coming to my party this weekend right?" I almost gagged at the smell wafting of her, did she take a bath in her perfume, why do guys like this so much?

" No Stephine, I wont be going." like hell I was going to that party. She holds it every year and every year guys get caught and kicked off the football team for drinking underage. I'm not going to risk my starter position for a party with illegal substances and drunk girls.

" please Tristan" Stephane stepped closer almost touching me. I started to hyperventilate, I had a major case of claustrophobia, only my close friends know this.

I have to get out here, between the suffocation amount of perfume and my claustrophobia, I was heading towards a major panic attack.

" go away Stephane" I pushed her back and sprinted outside for some air. Ignoring the weird looks sent my way.

Perfect I just know that some crazy rumors were going to start because of this. I leaned back on the outside wall of the schools second parking lot that was a bit more hidden and thankfully behind the school. Siding down to the ground I put my in between my knees and took some deep breaths, I felt like my heart was going to burst out of my chest.

Thankfully this wasn't to bad of an attack, but it did raise a lot of questions. Lets just hope it didn't cause any rumors to go around. This school is famous for tearing kids apart with nasty rumors.

I jumped feeling my phone buzz in my pocket, pulling my phone out to see who texted me

Max - you okay

T- no not really

M- Where are you? Ill bring you a bottle water.

T- behind the school in the B lot

M- be there in 5 k

T- k

At times like this I'm super thankful for friends, especially Max she's gotten me through a couple of attacks, she's like my big sister, and although she a couple months younger than me. She is a year ahead of me in school. And she is the only person who knows the reason behind my attacks and claustrophobia.

Damn it I shouldn't have thought about that, now all he see was the dust and hear the sirens and a little boy crying for ...

" Tristan? Its Max, look at me ok" I looked up to see a soft smile on her face. Which is rare she usually is rude and smirks as she will usually tease me to oblivion.

Just as I thought, the smile quickly diminished and a sting came to my face as I failed to notice her throwing a water bottle my way.

" Ow" I groaned

"you're such a baby I didn't even throw it that hard" she said.

Annoyed at the fact she took advantage of my week state. I raised my eyebrows in question cuz she in fact threw that very hard.

"what?" she sheepishly smiled,

That little turd, she knew exactly what she did. 

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We walked into the school just as first period ended, so the halls were slowly getting crowded. Tristan could see Justin in the distance and said his goodbyes to Max. She waved bye and walked to her club room, that weirdly looks like an interrogation room.

"Justin, how was chem?" he gave me a bored look as he replied.

"Horrible, Mr. Kemswick is so boring, I didn't get a thing he said"

"that bad huh"

"even worse because my bestest man in the world, skipped" he gave me an accusatory look, but his eyes showed concern knowning why tristan skipped, but he didn't want to pry so he remained silent.

Tristan knew he was going to want a little bit of an explanation. But he didn't like dwelling on those moments.

"I'm fine Max helped me out." he nodded knowing Max is like a sister to me.

The moment between us seemed to be getting more and more awkward as the seconds ticked. 

Suddenly the bell went off, wow i never thought i would get to use the saved by the bell phrase.

" See you at lunch" Tristan said as he looked at his schedule and had none other classes with Justin this morning.

"yup, see you there" he hesitantly walked of to his next class. Tristan was glad to not have Justin in class, he hated the looks he would give him. he knew that Justin was just concerned for him but he didn't want the pity that he gave either.

He nodded of to Mrs. Caste's lecture on the Civil War and was happy to rest his mind for a bit.

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**Finally, first chapter is done.

Hi my name is Josie. I am the author of 'not dead just gone' this is my first book ever, so please be merciful with the comments, at least nothing too hurtful. I know my grammar is a work in progress, but after I'm finished I will edit and fix up the chapters. For now I just want it posted and out there.

I'll try and update every 2 weeks. But I make no promises

See you guys later- J

Chapter one -June 21, 2023 **

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