Mongolian Golden Mongoose

I saw it in my dream. I don't even know if it exists or not, but I went to that lake again. It looked like a sea but wasn't actually a sea. I went to surf there and was having fun until I saw the crocodiles, so I ran away, leaving my cousin behind. I just didn't stay with her. I ran as far as I could, to the top of the mountain, just to be safe. What I saw there was that she was playing with the crocodiles, and they weren't hurting her. Maybe she saw me run away, but I had no choice but to go back, so I did. Surprisingly, the crocodiles attacked me but not her.After that, the water didn't suit me anymore. Whenever I touched it, shivers ran down my spine. It wouldn't accept me anymore because I had proven myself to be a selfish and cowardly human being. So I stayed at the shore while everyone worshipped those crocodiles for their mythical powers and how smart and friendly they were. I was the only one who got scared by them.As I reached the end of the beach, I saw a rock mountain wall with people sitting on the stone stairs carved into it. The stairs were perfectly chiseled. I climbed it and went inside. It was very cold there, and I sat for a long time, wondering what had happened to me. Maybe I had been banished from the land of the brave. Then I started seeing people I knew, which gave me some hope. However, I soon realized that these were people I only knew but had never really talked to or had any meaningful conversations with. They didn't know me; I was just a background element to them.Sitting on top of the stairs, that's when I saw the golden mongoose. I don't know why I called it the Mongolian Golden Mongoose, but I had to. The moment I looked at it, a wave of old memories hit me, making me think. I was sure that I had been here before. I had been banished before, a long time ago, and I had sat in this exact same place.That's when a mysterious woman walked in and sat beside me. Her presence alone allowed me to understand the purpose of her visit. She had a motherly feel to her, although she didn't look or talk like my mother. She just sat beside me, and I told her that I had been here before too. I didn't know the purpose of her visit, but I remembered now. I had seen that exact same Mongolian Golden Mongoose on that exact same branch, climbing up that tree using the exact same path. I remembered it vividly and clearly, even though I had never thought about it before. I knew it wasn't a false memory; indeed, I had been here.For what crimes, I didn't know, but I felt above the ground, even though my legs were on the ground. It might sound great, but it was a nightmare. I didn't have a grip on anything at all. I was a prisoner without free will. There wasn't any wind that could move me where I wanted to go, even though I didn't know if I wanted to go anywhere.I leaned on her, and I almost fell asleep. Suddenly, she spoke again and said she had to go because she had work. I sat there for a while, contemplating what to do. I was unsure of how to seek forgiveness and from whom. But then, something happened—a moment of realization. I took a baseball bat and ran down the stairs as fast as I could. When I finally reached the ground, I started beating the shit out of my school bully. At first, he didn't have a face, but as I showed more bravery, his face started to form. It wasn't like the face I was used to seeing; this time, he was scared of me. I felt content, as if I had mastered something. It felt less heavy, like forgetting baggage on a train, but it was the baggage I never really needed.