my big but adorable pregnant husband

ch 20

"I dreamed about you many times. Dirty dreams...like you on the pelvic table with your legs open to me..."

"......"

"I realized that only recently. That time when I asked you to share a house with me, I hadn't yet thought about the depth of my feelings. I swear it's true. And that's fine if you don't believe me."

Iwamoto is quiet.

"It's strange, isn't it, even though I'm already this old? I seem to have a lower libido than most people, and I've rarely lusted after men or women. That's why I never knew...but it seems I am gay. It wasn't too long ago that I discovered that I quite like you. If I had known about my se*uality, I would not have thoughtlessly asked you to live with me. It was my fault. I'm truly sorry."

Iwamoto blinks, but doesn't say anything yet. He must be shuddering now thinking that this whole time turns out he's been living with a pervert. He may even be horrified.

"This is the truth. I bet you wished you hadn't asked." I laugh. A bitter laugh to mock myself, of course. "I had a great time living with you, Iwamoto-san. It really was like...heaven."

However, as soon as I said that, my bitter laugh dissipates and is replaced by tears.

"If I could, I would love to live with you for the rest of my life. You are a truly wonderful person. I have never thought that being with someone is so much fun. With you, I can endure even the most painful things. I change a lot because of you too."

You changed the me who can't even make eye contact with people and the me who's being underestimated by everyone.

"I feel like I can't take it anymore. I'm sorry, I couldn't say it right away because I was scared." Now I am staring down at my feet, but my head is full of Iwamoto. Of his smile, his voice, his scent.

I take another deep breath to continue. Those are not my only sins.

"I'm the kind of guy that people rarely depend on. Well, I know people don't want to rely on a scared beanpole like me. So, when you asked for my help, I was overjoyed. My strength comes to me."

I remember Iwamoto's large hand holding onto me tightly. I'm sure I will never be able to forget that.

"I was quite glad that you, who couldn't accept the fact that you were an MFUU, had no one else to confide in but me... But the biggest reason I helped you by sharing a place to live was that I couldn't stand to imagine you living under the same roof with other men from your work."

I say, bracing myself for a beating.

"Your condition worked in my favor. Your misfortune, the streak of bad luck that befell you...made me excited. I took advantage of all that by making you run to me only..."

I speak again, startled by my own embarrassment.

"I know I'm the worst person ever...but I don't want to hate myself anymore than I already do..."

To my surprise, Iwamoto suddenly kneels down in front of me. His touch on my leg makes me lift my face.

"Sensei, that...are you serious?"

Iwamoto's face is in front of mine. His large warm hand settles on my lap. He is squatting, looking at me with the towel still on his head. There is no disgust in his eyes and it makes me wonder why. Why is he touching me? Doesn't he feel uncomfortable?

"Sensei, do you like me?"

I have no idea what is going on, so I nod my head several times.

"Me too..." Iwamoto's hand gripping my knees tighten. He speaks in a very small voice that it pains me.