the forbidden love

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 || 𝚝𝚠𝚘🤍

After dinner we sat in the bar for 1 hour, we were talking and laughing. I love spending time with them they my real friends. I don't have a lot of friends out of the paddock, that's because I'm always in the paddock and secondly everyone just being friends with me because of my dad and I hate that. He's just a person too!!!

The next day

I was a little hungover because I drank too much, I never know how many cocktails or shots should I drink so I usually drank too much. It wasn't that bad, I took a pill for my headache and started getting ready for breakfast. I ate my breakfast with Lewis and George.

'Are you guys nervous?' I ask from them because we were sitting in silence and I don't like silence because than I always start thinking about anything especially about my mom. I hate the feeling that I don't know her or I don't have any memories with her. I don't remember anything and my dad doesn't like to talk about it either.

'Only a little maybe' answers Lewis first

'I'm nervous like hell!' says George and I almost laughed because he sounded nervous in a little funny way.

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'Honey we have to go' my dad knocked on my door really hard he almost broke my door.

'I'm here we can go' I opened it before he could break it. Today was the free practice one and two. It's nothing serious, they testing the track, the tires and the car of course. It's quite boring.

Nothing interesting happened today. I spent most of my time with the Mercedes engineers, Lewis and George and my father. I talked a little bit with Carlos, we had so much fun in the past, but nowadays we don't have time for each other somehow. I miss him.

The next day

Today is the anniversary of my mother's death. I always cry in these days but today I can't, we have qualifying today. Everyone seems busy and no one has one minute to talk with me. I need to do something or I will cry! I sat the same bench as the other day and Charles came to me again as he was passing by. He saw that I'm not feeling well, he sat next to me and I appreciated it.

'Hey mon chère. What happened?'

'Nothing' I say and the first tear drop rolled down my face as I said it out loud.

'Don't cry!!' he hugs me tightly, he's not letting me go until I'm not telling him why I'm crying.

'My mom... she's died right today 14 years ago. And no one has one minute to hug me or anything' I say and when I finished I was crying like a baby.

'Shh it's okay I'm here for you! You know that right?' he asks and I just nodded still crying. Sadly he had to go because the qualifying starting soon. I tried to get myself together and go inside the Mercedes garage and watch Lewis and George.

We're ended up with P2 and P7, wasn't so bad for a start, tomorrow we'll be so much better than this. After a lot and lot interviews we finally left the paddock.

'So now I'm here' says Lewis sitting down my bed in my hotel room.

'What do you mean?'

'Your mom, your sadness, you can say now what's up with you, I can listen now. I know you probably just needed me before too but you know I was busy'

'Yeah... I know' I rolled my eyes and laid down next to him. ' I don't want to talk about it' I finished the conversation with this, I really don't want to talk about it. I cried it out on Charles's shoulder today and it felt enough for today. I posted a picture of her in my story saying sorry for not knowing her that much how much I wanted though and that I miss her. I bought a candle and a flower bouquet what is on the track now. After the qualifying I went out and put it on the place where I remembered she took me when I was 2 years old. That's the only memory I have with her in the paddock and it seemed a good memorial for her life.

The race day

'Morning Carlos' I hugged him as I arrived down the lobby. We talked it yesterday that we had breakfast together, because we didn't talked like the first race in Bahrain.

'Hey Jasmine' he hugged me back happily.

After breakfast we said our goodbyes and I went to my room back to get ready for the race. I wasn't sure what to wear so I picked a white mercedes shirt and a black jean with my black converse shoe. I combed my long blondish brown hair and let it hang straight on my shoulders. I was ready to leave, I texted my father to meet me in the hallway, but he was already out and were in the paddock.

As I entered the paddock I heard the fans screaming and yelling my name so I went there to give some signature to them. I'm not a famous driver and everything but because my dad is a well-known person most of the people knows who I am too and I have a lot of fan thanks to that. I like it they like an army, they supporting me in everything.