𝕋ℍ𝔼 𝕊𝕀𝕊𝕋𝔼ℝ 𝕋ℍ𝔼𝕐 𝕃𝕆𝕊𝕋

~ Chapter - 36 ~

- X A V I E R - 

"What did you say to mom?" I asked Xander. I could hear her saying something but it didn't seem like she was scolding him and Xander looked like he wanted to cry. I was sure something else has happened.

"I hurt her." He said quietly. "I said things I shouldn't have, just like I always do." 

"What did you say?" 

He was quiet for a few moments and I was getting more tense by each passing second. Why can't he just talk for god's sake? It's not like I'll judge him or anything. We have messed up way more than this a lot of times. Good or bad, I'll forever choose his side. 

"Xander." I shook him violently. "Tell me."

"I told her she doesn't understand you and that she hurt you with what she did." 

"Bro." I groaned. "You realise you made it worse, right?" 

"You are not the one to speak, dude." He scoffed. "You make things worse all the time."

I looked at him, speechless. He is right, there is no doubt in that, but I never expected him to say that like this. It looked like he was blaming me. My brother, my twin brother, was blaming me. He is the only one who tries to understand me. Dad has already given up a long time ago, Mom might have too today and Elijah was just hanging on. I don't have anyone to rely on, besides Xander. 

"You do realise whatever happened today started with you as well, right?" Xander laughed dryly. "You fought with mom. I got angry because of you."

"I didn't tell you to say that shit to mom. Do not put it on me, okay!" I yelled. "You are being ridiculous trying to play all nice and good now." 

"Are you hearing yourself?" He shouted back. "You know what bro, it's useless talking to you. It's f'king useless. It's always about 'you'. Your problems, your anger, your feelings. It's always you! Aria, Elijah and mom didn't tell both of us, but who went and acted crazy ruining everything? You brother you!"

I kept quiet. I have already lost so many relationships, I can't loose another. Xander has stood by me in all situations, I can't ruin everything with him too. He is angry. I'm sure he doesn't mean it.

"You don't have anything to say now? Is The Xavier Hernandez speechless? Wow. Maybe if you kept quiet like this a few hours earlier, everything would have been fine." Xander continued his rant, his words piercing through my heart more and more. "You need to handle your anger issues, I don't know how you'll do it and honestly I don't care but you need to control your temper. Or I'm done." 

"You were the one who started having problems with Aria." He said and I stilled. "She was just a kid. Of course she would irritate us at times. But you overreacted. She just wanted to spend time with us, but you treated her with so much hostility. We were all so close, Xav. You loved watching movies with her, we had so much fun with those pillow fights- Me and you versus her and Lijah, she made all the things fun but now it's all so weird. We keep saying we are trying we are trying but we are not trying! Cause you don't want to, Xav."

"It's not-"

"Shut up and listen for once." Xander gritted out. "You wanted to mend things with Lijah, so you tried. And everything got sorted. With Aria, you are not even trying. You are making excuses, you think everyone is wrong except you. Stop with this victim mindset and start taking some f'king responsibilty."

"You are acting like everything was my decision and I forced you to accept that." I shot back. He can't put all the blame on me and tell me all this shit while he does the same things himself. "You do the same things too, Xander. You mess up too but the only difference is I never think once before taking your side. I never blame you."

"Are you f'king stupid? This is the first time I have ever did something like this and did you look at your reaction? Did you ask me if I was okay? No. Cause you don't care about anyone but yourself."

"You are no better." I scoffed at his words. I didn't jump on him with all these accusations, he did. 

"Obviously I ain't." He laughed. "I'm your twin." 

"You-" I was about to retort back when my phone buzzed. It was Elijah. 

"Now go ahead and hurt him too." Xander taunted. He was getting on my nerves now. "Go on. What are you waiting for?" 

I ignored him. 

"Hello." I answered the call. "What do you want now?"

"Can you behave like a decent human being for once?" Elijah sighed from the other side. 

"Can you tell me what do you f'king want without wasting my time? Please." 

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Wow, what a pleasant day. Another person yelling at me for no apparent reason. "There was absolutely no reason for you to create the drama you did in front of Cath and all the other people in the street. I told you we'll talk about it but no, you have to give an instant overreaction."

"Yeah it was just me right?"

"It was you and Xander, fine? But that's not the point here. Why do you always have to be so impatient?" 

"I wasn't. How am I supposed to sort things out with Ilaria if she acts like this? Are you going to be the mediator all your life?" 

"I would have to be the mediator for as long as you guys don't learn how to control your temper. Because I can't trust you to be alone with her when you start getting physically aggressive." Elijah scoffed taking me by shock. I thought she didn't tell anyone about the fight she and Xander had? It has been so long since that happened. And even if Lijah did know, why is he bringing this up now? 

"First of all, it was Xander and not me." Xander's head snapped towards me. "And it was just one time. It's not like we hit her or anything." 

"Xav." Elijah sounded tired. And he was obviously tired of me. "Give the phone to Xander or put it on the speaker. I have no energy to deal with you when you don't want to listen only."

"Of course." I shoved my phone in Xander's hand who was glaring at me. I was done. 

I started having issues with Ilaria first. Agreed. It was very childish at first. She was annoying at times and I have always had a very short temper. But slowly, the silly fun banters turned into something very weird and resentful. I don't hate her. She's my sister. I can never even think of hating her. But it was too late when I realised that I was truly the one in the wrong. It was easier for me to pretend that I didn't care than to apologise.

Xander, however, acts like he cares but he is the real coward. I never forced him to do anything. He was mean to her. He was the one who got so aggressive with her, not me. He is responsible for his own actions just like I'm for mine. 

He was ranting to Elijah now, leaving out all the things he did wrong. I took a deep breath and left the room. I couldn't stand being around him anymore. It was better for both of us to cool down and then talk things out. He was being too irrational and stubborn to deal with right now. 

"Weeds are flowers too, once you get to know them."
- Winnie the Pooh

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