Bad Habits (Luten)

Chapter One

Yukhei's mind raced as he listened to his lecturer talk about the assignment, one that was due in two weeks time and was worth a good portion of his grade. Well, it was worth a good portion of everyone's grade. Ever since getting the assignment a week or two ago, he had been stressing himself out. Not many people knew about it though because he had been masking it from everyone, even the person that he loved since moving to Thailand. Chittaphon. Compared to the stress of the assignment, Yukhei was more scared of how his boyfriend would react to him about his stress. He had a feeling that his boyfriend would make it sound more serious than it actually was, though sometimes it did feel more serious than it actually was.

Yukhei tried to focus on what his lecturer was saying, but because of his constant racing mind, it was impossible to focus on his university class. His leg bounced up and down, something that he had been doing for half of the class, not that anyone noticed. Everyone else was either actually focused on the class, acting like they were paying attention or doing a mixture of both. Yukhei had a look at the time on his computer. Two twenty. He still had another ten minutes before the class would end. If it was even possible, having ten minutes left of the class made his mind race even more than it already was. Because of his constantly racing mind, his eyes began to follow his mind and race between the time on his computer and the lecturer. He wanted the class to end already, though it was safe to assume that the other students wanted it to end as well.

***

Chittaphon's final class of the day had ended much earlier than expected. Usually, his final class ended at the same time as Yukhei's final class, but this time it had ended earlier. Not that he was complaining because it meant that he could surprise his boyfriend when he finished his class. Chittaphon laid on his bed, looking through his notes for the day. His notes were in preparation for his exams that were happening soon. His exams tended to happen a little earlier than his boyfriend's, though he didn't mind it. Chittaphon was always surprised by the amount of notes that he would write during the day. He never really noticed how much he wrote during the day until either by the end of the day or until his hand hurt by the end of the class.

He looked through the pages and pages of notes that he had written through out the entire day, wanting to make sure that he took in everything. He wanted to make sure that he passed the exams because he had been doing pretty well up to this point, passing every assessment and practice exams with flying colours. It would be a shame if he had failed something now or had gotten a much lower grade than he had gotten previously. That was enough motivation to make sure that he looked through the numerous notes from all of his classes. Like every other student, he didn't know what was going to be in the exam, which was the main reason why he was looking through pages and pages of notes.

Sure, he still had some time before his exams, which were weeks away, but he still wanted to be prepared. He also wanted to make the time go faster since he didn't want to just do nothing while the time went by slowly. Page after page he studied. He wondered how Yukhei's day had been.

***

Finally for what had seemed like forever, the class had come to an end. Took long enough, he thought. Everything that he had on his desk went straight into his bag. He didn't waste any time getting out of the lecture theatre. He practically sped down the stairs, though that wasn't unusual. Everyone else sped down the stairs of the lecture theatre and out through the two large doors. Usually, Yukhei would go straight back to the dorm, but that wasn't the case this time. Knowing the path to hiding spots that barely anyone knew about, he went to his little hiding spot. One that he found on the first day in his first year. His little hiding place was behind a school building that was close to a department store. No one in close proximity, safe enough for him go into the alleyway without causing suspicion. First thing first, though, Yukhei got his phone out of his pocket and typed in his password, though got it incorrect twice before finally entering it correctly. He went into his messages between him and Chittaphon, already knowing what he was going to type.

Xuxi: hey babe, I'm gonna be a little late coming back to the dorm. talking to lecturer about the assignment.

He pressed the send button and watched as the text was delivered to his partner. The three dots appeared not long after and he had to admit, it did scare him a bit. While he had been hiding his smoking habit from Chittaphon for some time, there was always a part of Yukhei that was scared that his boyfriend had figured something was up. Though the text that he received relaxed his mind.

Bubba: ok baby. <3.

With the relief that his little secret was still safe, Yukhei turned his phone off and placed it back in his pocket. He sat down on the ground and placed his bag in front of him, unzipping his bag in a rush. He always kept his cigarettes in his bag, though the pack was usually in a well hidden pocket. It made it easier to carry around with him without anyone else seeing or knowing that he has them nor that he smokes. He got his pack of cigarettes and zippo lighter out of the little hidden pocket, getting one cigarette out of the pack. He flicked the lighter open, sparking the flame soon after. He placed the cigarette in between his lips and brought the small flame closer to it, the cigarette taking a moment to be lit. Once it was lit, Yukhei closed the zippo lighter and put it back into his hidden pocket of his bag, taking in a deep breath from the butt end of the cigarette. The smoke from it filled his lungs to the brim.

As soon as the cigarette was away from his lips and in between his fingers, the smoke left his lungs and into the air that surrounded him. The stress he felt blew away with the smoke that he had inhaled only a moment ago. No matter how many times he had secretly smoked, he always felt relieved whenever he breathed it in. He waited a few moments before taking in another breath from the object in his hand. To make it last a bit longer, he spaced out the puffs he took from the cigarette. Yukhei wondered back to the first time he had ever smoked one cigarette, when he was twenty one and first started going to college with Chittaphon. The moment he had brought his first pack along with the zippo lighter and had found his secret spot not that long after, the first ever cigarette he had tried from the packet. The realization that his stress melting away was what caused him to pick up the habit.

A part of Yukhei felt guilty for not telling his partner about it, but the other part of him didn't want to say anything about it because he knew Chittaphon would excessively worry about it. He took a few more puffs from the cigarette before he threw it onto the ground, stepping on it so it wouldn't cause any fires on anything flammable nearby. From not having zipped up his bag yet, he got his body spray as well as some mints. He needed to make sure that there was no traces of any cigarette scent left behind on him. It was how he had managed to keep his cigarette secret hidden.