romance is dead ❧ q.k | ✔

book one ❧ [iv]

Walking into the student union building after your second class, you meandered around until you finally spotted three familiar heads at a table in a far corner of the third floor. You plopped down into the open seat beside Ten.

"Were you guys hiding from me or something?" You scoffed, snatching a fry from Kunhang's plate in front of you.

"Yeah, because I was hoping to eat all my own food this time," the gryphon rolled his eyes, but made no move to stop you as you took another fry.

The siren beside you was drawing in one of his many sketchbooks—he was an art major—and you peered over his shoulder to see what he was working on. The whole spread was filled with pencil sketches at various stages of completion, angles, and facial expressions of what seemed like your entire little friend group: you, Kunhang, Dejun, Yangyang, and the final creature that was sitting at your table now, Sicheng.

Sicheng's fiery orange and yellow eyes looked at you analytically as the phoenix sipped on his fountain drink. He set it down to look at you with a cocked head, curious. "Why were you so late, Y/N?"

"I had to make sure the coast was clear."

"Oh, do you have a little bloodsucking stalker?" Kunhang asked in understanding.

"He's not stalking me, he's been very unfortunately, unconsentingly—on both our parts—put under the effects of a love potion. I don't fault him for that, okay?"

Ten and Sicheng exchanged bewildered looks.

"God, Kunhang, did you not already tell them? I thought you would've gone around blabbing this hilarious story to everyone we know by now!" You snipped at him, dreading the thought of having to relive the mortification of retelling the events of last night over again.

"I'm sorry, did you want me to?" He bickered back without missing a beat. "I'll go get on the PA system right now."

You shot him a glare before delving into the gist of it yourself. "Long story short, last night I was over at Kunhang and Yangyang's. Qian Kun was there too, Yangyang's vampire... friend? Acquaintance? Anyway, Yangyang made a love potion and like an idiot, put it in their fridge in a Gorgonade bottle then left it unattended. I accidentally drank it, and now Kun is in love with me because his blood was in the potion."

Their jaws dropped in unison.

"Uhm—" Sicheng didn't seem to know where he was going with that, scratching the back of his head before picking his soda back up.

"Anyway, this man has gone like full 18th-century courting or whatever on me." You held your head in your hands, replaying the moment of him handing you the poem in your mind.

"And they say chivalry is dead," Kunhang pretended to swoon.

"Haha, you should do stand-up," you said sarcastically. "Seriously, what am I supposed to say when he hands me a goddamn sonnet? 'Thanks, sick poem, bestie?'"

"He wrote you a sonnet? Where is it? Can I read it?"

"I would sooner let Ten drown me than let you read a sonnet that..." you sighed, your voice getting smaller and smaller with each word, "describes the shape of my lips."

You shuddered at the thought of your friend ever laying eyes upon something like that. He would never let you live it down.

"Aw come on Y/N!"

"Too late, I already burned it!" You stuck your tongue out at Kunhang, who just did it right back.

"Have you given him anything, Y/N?" Ten spoke up, setting his pencil down.

"I am not writing him a sonnet, Ten."

"I don't mean like that. I mean, have you done any sort of reciprocity? Given him any information about yourself? Engaged with him, genuinely, on any level at all?" He paused then, and you slowly shook your head. Your friend's ocean blue scales shimmered just beneath the skin of his cheekbones as he turned in his seat to face you, reflective gold eyes focused on you. "Look, I know he's under the love potion and you're not, and I'm not saying you have to treat these as sincere romantic advances from him. But maybe try to approach them at least as genuine opportunities for human connection. Or, human-vampire connection. You know what I mean."

You scrunched your nose up thoughtfully. "I haven't really thought about it like that. Huh..."

"I think if you at least give him a little nudge about the stuff that you do like, he'll stop writing you sonnets."

"Yeah, I mean, he's just going to keep courting you for the duration of the potion, Y/N, whether you want him to or not. Might as well get a car out of it or something," Kunhang suggested through a mouthful of fries.

"I am not going to exploit him like that!" You scoffed. "And swallow before you talk! You're going to get gross food bits on me!"

Sicheng wordlessly handed Kunhang a napkin.