Rishi's Haircut

"Yes! I'm up!" Rishi lived with his aged mother, and two younger siblings. He was the sole provider for his family but not out of choice. His father was a drunkard, his mother was becoming too frail for her construction job and his siblings were still in school. The cliché of it all wasn't lost on him.

Rishi was a classically handsome young man. Growing up, people in his neighborhood would comment how Rishi resembled a famous movie star, "same eyes, same nose, same hair." But these days he was lucky if he even had time to brush his hair before darting out the door by six a.m. to work. He worked at Rao Trucking Company, where a fleet of commercial trucks were commissioned for various purposes: construction, transportation, delivery and Rishi's gig: water distribution. Today, he would drive the truck first to the West Malarkodi water plant, before heading to Prestige Housing Complex to fill the residential water tank. It was his favorite route because he could blast his favorite music on the highway connecting the water plant to the housing complex, thirty minutes away.

He drove past the large, chrome "Prestige Complex" sign, nodding at the security guard. He carefully drove up the driveway, past the playground and as he was about to take a sharp right towards the water tank, he saw her. She wore a yellow top, her hair was long and shiny and she was gathering it out of her face. He almost side scraped his truck by not paying attention to his turn. But the last thing on his mind was the truck, or the water tank to be filled. He felt tingles through his body, his stomach felt hollow, he was excited, nervous, shocked even... all at once. In an ideal world, he would have jumped out of his truck, jogged back towards the playground and taken her in a little longer. But he was there to deliver water, and if the security guard or any of the residents caught him gazing at her, he knew Mr. Rao would get wind of it and he would be promptly sacked. He decided he would roll out the connecting pipe, fill the water tank quickly, and catch another sneaky glimpse on his way out.

As he rolled out the pipe and fastened it to the tanker, he repeatedly looked over his shoulders, making sure she was still there. And she was. She was helping a toddler up the slide, and then she went out of sight. "She has a child! What are you doing, Rishi?" he said out loud to himself, his voiced drowned by the loud drumming of the water filling the tank. "But maybe she's the sister...or nanny," he trailed holding onto hope. At that moment, these were just details. He hadn't felt this excited, or any strong emotion for that matter, in such a long time. He was excited simply to feel excited. A short while later, the water tank was filled. He rolled the connecting pipe back up, hung it securely to the back of his truck and climbed back into his seat. "She's definitely left by now," he said to prepare himself for the disappointment. He reversed his truck and prepared to take a sharp left back past the playground towards the front gates. She was still there! And she turned when she heard his truck nearing the playground, made eye contact with him...and he could have sworn he saw her smile a little! Rishi almost crashed the truck into the security guard post. His heart was exploding out of his chest.

He was sweating, his fingers were ice cold, he was smiling from ear to ear as he exhaled his first breath since leaving the gates. Could it be? Was she interested in him as well? So, it definitely wasn't her kid! Or maybe she was in an abusive relationship looking for a way out? His head was swimming with a million thoughts but he never felt happier. He turned up his favorite Tamil song and belted it at the top of his lungs. He finally felt young, hopeful and free. All things he hadn't felt in such a long time. He drove into Mr. Rao's trucking center, parked at his designated spot, collected his salary for the day ($15) and walked out feeling light as a feather.

Deesha was visiting her parents from the US with her two-year-old daughter. They had already been in town for a week but her toddler's jet lag was still going strong. Every morning around 7 a.m., she would take her daughter to the playground, in hopes of tiring her out for a late morning nap. The little one, who would have been up since 4 a.m. would show no sign of slowing down but usually by around 8 a.m., Deesha would catch her daughter plopped in the sand pit, looking dazed. She would immediately carry her out of the playground, up the elevator, back to her parents' place for a quick wash-up, snack, and then a long-awaited nap. Due to the jet-lag, these naps lasted four-six hours, allowing Deesha to rest up herself, and watch TV and unwind a little. Deesha's husband had stayed back in the US to work. Things were a little rough at home – her husband's demanding job, a new baby, Deesha's post-partum, and the never-ending learning and adjusting that came with being new parents. She missed her old self and her old life, even though she knew it wasn't as glamorous as she recollected it to be. But what she really missed was her freedom. Because the bickering, the stress, the anxiety had all been there before the baby too.

Today at the park, she had spotted a ruggedly handsome man drive a water truck into her parents' apartment complex. He had young eyes but a tired face. If he was on one of those makeovers shows, they would give him a fresh haircut, outfit him in a round-collared shirt, some nice jeans, and teach him how to groom and take care of himself. This was one of her favorite little pastimes – imagining how the watchman, street vendor, grocery store clerk, etc., would look if they were given a full makeover. This truck driver had been the most attractive stranger she had seen since arriving at her parents' and she was intrigued. It had also been a while since she received male attention and it seemed as though he was staring at her. She enjoyed it, and unintentionally smiled at him. She looked around to make sure nobody had seen this interaction in fear of community gossip.

Rishi usually brought his $15 straight home to his mother, ate something, took a nap before getting ready for his evening job as a busboy. But today, he stopped at the hair salon for a fresh haircut. He had caught his reflection in the truck rearview mirror and what he saw was not acceptable. His side burns were outgrown, his hair was coiled in random curls. He was a mess. He needed to get himself together before tomorrow's water run. He had also already picked out his favorite collared polo shirt (and also only one without holes) to wear. "Make the sides shorter, and leave the top a little longer...like a movie star," he instructed once he was in the salon chair, rattling off names of some famous personalities for reference. "Arrey hero! Who is all this for?" teased the barber. "Stop!" Rishi replied sternly, only to break into a sheepish smile. "Ahaaa! I knew it," quipped the barber and got to work.

She had been up since 5 but she had pep in her step this morning. She jumped in the shower, washed her hair, and was picking out a cute outfit when her mom asked, "Are you planning to go somewhere today?" "No. Just the playground. Wanted to shower and get ready so I felt a little fresher, that's all," she shrugged off. But she was hoping the cute truck driver would be back today, so she could make eye contact, and feel the rush of breaking so many rules. She picked out a light cotton top, put on gold hoop earrings, and swiped on some red chapstick. She looked cute and thought to herself, "Why don't I do this more?" She got her daughter ready and by 9 a.m., they were both at the playground.

Around 9:10, she heard the loud rumbling of the water truck, arriving at the complex gates. She fixed her hair and straightened her top. She then caught a glance of her daughter, struggling to climb onto the merry-go-round and felt a tinge of guilt. Guilt for ignoring her daughter's needs, and also for knowingly trying to entice the attention of another man. It was all so ridiculous, yet she reminded herself that there was still a part of Deesha that was there before marriage, before the baby, that she needed to tend to as well. By this time, he was slowly driving past her. And then he turned and looked directly at her. She saw that he had gotten a haircut. And she knew it wasn't a coincidence, his trip to the salon after their encounter yesterday was deliberate. He wanted to look nice for her. This made her angry, "why does he think he even stands a chance with me?" Then she felt bad at her blatant classism, snobbery, self-righteousness...all of it. She had smiled at him, and threw a line out first. The guilt she had felt moments earlier bubbled up again, this time even stronger. On top of everything else, she now felt bad for leading on this young man, who up until that day had routinely delivered water without any hope for a love connection.

Seconds after their eyes met, she looked away sharply. And never looked back at him again. Rishi felt that intentional disconnection, and felt worried that he had misread the signs. Would she tell on him to the complex security who would then contact Mr. Rao? What had he done? Of course, there was no way she had smiled at him – she was a rich, young mom, who had been smiling at somebody else passing by. He had no rights to misinterpret that gesture and now he felt like a fool. He quickly veered the truck towards the water tank, went about refilling it with water and just as quickly packed up and drove out the complex gates.

After that day, Deesha only took her daughter to the playground in the evenings.

Rishi grew his hair out, until one day Mr. Rao asked him to cut his hair or push it out of his face when he drove one of his trucks. So, Rishi tied his hair back in a ponytail, putting off sitting back down on the salon chair for as long as possible.