Silhouette

Recording 1

What would you do, if one day, without any reason everyone lost their... self?
Lost their color, their emotions, their relationship with you, their... they?

Being only a silhouette of themselves, black, emotionless, kinda of... indifferent to you, to everyone.

That's what happened to me, two days ago I woke up, ate my breakfast, commuted to school... That's was when I realised, something was off, I didn't know exactly what, although thinking right now, it should've been obvious. I just had a... feeling, unease, offness. I told myself that I am just tired, which was probably true.

I went to school, standard noise, everyone doing their stuff, constant unrecognizable chatter. I sat in my bench, watched my phone and the class started. That was when I focused on people finally, they were so off, their facial expressions were gone, I could hear the emotions! But their faces... not only that, their whole bodies were more... static. They looked as if they should give some emotions, meaning. That wasn't the case though, they were just moving, chaotically,  erratic movements that transferred nothing to me. 

With each second everything started to lose it's sense, it's meaning, everything started to fade, they were still there, but not as someone, but more as a... void, someoneless void, a hole in world.

I looked at my classmates with panic, they were doing, what they always have been doing. Somebody was sleeping, somebody was taking notes, someone else was playing on their phone, they didn't react to my face, my movements, my... existence. 

I simply said - I am going to the toilet and left, I was trying to think about it, I drank some water and thought, thought... but after a second I noticed, where should be memories of their face, their looks, it was just a blackness, nothing. I know it is there, I can imagine my friends faces, but in my memories, they does not exist. They were absent and my mind just had put a dark, really black silhouette, of what should've been there.

I checked my phone - lesson should end soon, I should grab my backpack - I thought.

I looked at each open class, it's the same, my class is still empty. Empty? 

There were people, but their presence was... nonexistent, so it was just natural for me to think it was empty, so I took my backpack and decided to skip today's lessons. They actually stopped making sense, words without meaning were coming out of my teachers mouth. It wasn't a foreign language, it wasn't even a random collection of letters, it was my language. My mother tongue, but! The words lacked meaning... I couldn't understand a single thing that he was telling. 

When walking back home, I noticed... everyone was like that, blackness, void, emptiness, where there should be people.

Somebody was shopping, somebody played with dog, some kid was crying in a shop, but... it felt empty, as if it didn't matter, what was real I thought - me? or everyone else.

Was everyone becoming not real, or was I losing a sense of realness?

It was a terrifying thought, cause if I were becoming a void, what could I do? Would I be like this forever? Would my family, my friends, my... girlfriend notice?

That's right, I had girlfriend, or did I?

I... felt a bit scared, now I wasn't entirely sure, something was off... It felt as if my memories became less and less... real?

It's as if you were recalling something that happened long ago, but you are not entirely sure if it happened, it could've been a dream, you don't think it was a dream, but you can not be sure, unless you test it somehow.