The Bet

23) Spiraling

This is not good.

I'm spiraling. I can feel it.

It's been a week and I've hardly been able to drag myself to the diner for four hour shifts, let alone 'The Cave'. It's the worst timing in the world to be in a slump though, because I need to make back that five grand I flushed away, and quick, but how am I supposed to do that when I only get out of bed to pee and work part time at the diner?

I glared at the ceiling fan I've been lying under for what feels like centuries.

I need to feed the gremlin. All the fast food he's been getting to replace what I'd usually cook is draining my bank account, and we're all out of easy mac and cereal, which about covers the extent of his culinary abilities.

I rolled out of bed and the world spun, but I walked through it.

The boy needs food.

Food that isn't going to break the bank even more than she's already been broken.

By me.

Ugh.

I opened my bedroom door and was assaulted by the sound of Mickey killing zombies in Rise of The Dead 3 in the living room. My temples immediately started pounding.

He muted it the second he saw me wince. Mickey looked at me, alarmed, and probably a little surprised by my appearance outside of my abode. "Sorry, Sammy. How are you feeling? You look better."

  Liar.

I passed by him without responding.

Talking is too much right now.

I made it to the kitchen and frowned at the pan on the hot stove. What in the world? I lifted the lid to look inside and felt the blood drain from my face when the steam hit my nose.

"Oh, I was trying to make dinner, but I think something might have gone wrong because —"

I bolted to the restroom to puke.

Oh, something might have gone wrong?

YOU THINK?

I barely made it to the toilet before retching into it, not that it made much of a difference. There isn't much in my stomach to vomit up, but it's the thought that counts, I guess.

  The toilet seat certainly makes a nice place to rest my head while I break down into sobs, though.

  I cried as I heaved. The dizziness and the migraines and and noise and the smells. It's all too much. I can't even do something as simple as making my little brother dinner without it being too much.

  I clutched my head and sobbed.

  WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE BROKEN, BRAIN?

  I know you've been through the ringer, but I've been right there with you, so why do you have to betray me like this?

  I rested my head back on the cool surface of the toilet seat and pouted. I haven't had a concussion this bad in ages. I don't know how I coped with it at the time.

  Maybe I'm not as strong as I used to be.

 

~~~~~~

  The bathroom door opened, interrupting me mid cry.

  I glared at Mickey. "Occupied."

  He can use the Galiger's bathroom downstairs if he really needs to go.