Times They Fell in Love [Destiel drabbles]

Messed up

It doesn't take Charlie long to figure out that Dean has feelings for Castiel. It also doesn't take long for her to accidentally tell Cas just that. [Canonverse]

I'll try to make sure to include warnings on any drabbles that should have them. I know some people are very sensitive to certain things and I want to make sure to avoid that. This one has strong language, some denial regarding sexuality and generally quite dark themes. You have been warned.

"Die, you monster, die!" Charlie, Cas and Dean were in the bunker, watching the worst movie any of them had ever watched. "No, you die!"

Charlie sighed.

Dean pulled a face.

"Dude," Charlie mumbled.

Dean turner off the movie. "How could you ever think it would be a good idea to watch this?" he asked, raising his brows.

Charlie shrugged. "Looked interesting," she said as she tilted her head.

"Mhm-hm," Dean responded.

Charlie sat on top of one of the armrests. Dean sat in the middle of the sofa, a bottle of beer in one hand, the remote in the other. Cas sat quietly next to him.

Dean looked at him and smiled.

Cas still stared at the screen. He then got up. "I'm going to my room now. Good night." He said it in a deep, monotone voice that Dean kind of loved. Cas was grumpy and tired.

"Night, Cas," Dean answered.

Charlie just smiled at him, gave him a short wave and proceeded to snap the remote from Dean.

"Hey!" Dean protested.

Charlie swapped through the movies until Cas was out of the room. She then pushed the remote underneath the pillow.

"Bitch," Dean mumbled.

"Jerk. You really are a jerk."

Dean looked at Charlie, confused.

"You keep ignoring him," she continued.

Dean still didn't get what she was talking about.

"Cas, Dean! You're in love with him, and it's killing me to see you like that."

Dean crossed his arms over his chest. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

He reminded Charlie of a little kid. "Dammit, Dean. You can ignore this shit all you want, but the hard truth is, it won't go away. Hell, I've tried. I tried for years. Told myself it was just a phase, it would pass. It won't Dean. You're wasting your time."

Dean didn't think he had ever heard Charlie sound so irritated about anything. She clearly meant this.

"Charlie, I'm not ignoring anything. You're just fantasizing."

Charlie bit her teeth together and sighed as loudly as she could manage. It made her face look really weird, but in some way extremely serious too. "Fine by me, just keep up your bullshit. I don't care."

Dean rolled his eyes. "Good thing, Charlie. I'm going to bed." He left.

Charlie shrugged and grabbed the remote. She actually had the TV to herself for once. Still, she was annoyed. She blamed Baby - Dean seemed to think she was his current sexuality.

--------

It was late in the afternoon. They just had dinner. Dean made his famous burgers, and they were delicious as always. Currently he was on a mission to get some pie.

Sam was looking for new cases in his room.

Castiel and Charlie were in the library. Cas had quite the peculiar taste in books - he went from YA to science fiction to poetry. He was currently reading a book he picked at random from the library.

Charlie was re-reading Harry Potter for the hundredth time.

Castiel looked up from his book after a while. He found it quite boring. "Did you watch another movie last night?" he asked, tired of the silence.

"No," Charlie answered. "We just talked for a while."

Cas looked at her. "About what?" he asked, hoping for the answer to be something the two of them could talk about just then. Her answer shocked him.

"You," she said with a shrug. Shit, shit, shit. Charlie had screwed up, and really bad too. She bit her lip.

"What did he say about me?" Cas asked curiously, clearly not caring about Charlie's role in the previous conversation.

"You know," she said.

Cas furrowed his brows. "No, I don't," he said.

"Cas.." she started. She had spilled too much already. She may as well spill the rest. "He really likes you."

Cas's whole face lit up. "I like him too."

Charlie sighed. "Romantically."

Castiel's mouth turned into an o. "Oh," he said, considering the information for a bit. "Well, that's flattering."

Charlie sighed again. Cas clearly didn't realize how serious this was.

"Cas, he's really serious about this."

Castiel's smile faded. He concentrated, clearly making a really important decision. "In that case, I can be serious about it too."

Charlie started to smile, but it disappeared as quickly as it appeared.

Dean was standing in the doorway. How long had he been standing there? "Serious about what, Cas?"

Charlie mouthed Dean a "sorry" and brought her book with her towards anywhere else.

"Dean, Charlie told me."

Dean sighed, removed himself from the doorway, and sat down across from Cas. "Charlie is convinced that I have feelings for you," Dean mumbled.

Cas nodded.

"I'm sorry about all of this. She really made a mess. Sorry if it made you uncomfortable or anything."

"Dean, I have feelings for you too."

Dean bit his lip so hard he could feel the taste of blood. "Damnit, Charlie!" he yelled. "This is messed up, man." That idiot Cas, always so straight forward.

"Dean," Cas said, doing his best to calm him down. "Dean, it's okay."

Dean got up, pushed the chair as hard as he could manage and threw Cas's book to the ground. The pages spread around the room. It took him a while to feel the tears streaming down his cheeks. He kicked the chair, threw some books of the table, clenched his fists. Then, he suddenly lost all energy and sat down on the cold floor. "Fuck this, Cas. This is wrong. My feelings are wrong. It's gotta be your freaking angel mojo or something. This is not who I am. This is messed up."

Cas, still not quite getting the clue, sat down next to Dean. He put an arm around him and was surprised when Dean leaned his head on Cas's shoulder. He could feel the warm tears landing on his sweater. 

"I don't see why this would be wrong," Cas mumbled, holding Dean closer.

All of a sudden, Dean didn't see it either. He could not find a single reason for this to be wrong.

They just sat like that for a while.

Cas enjoyed the smell of Dean. He smelled so good. His hair smelled like apples, from the cheap shampoo they were using.

Dean was breathing loudly, exhausted from feeling so many emotions at once. He put his arms around Cas, needing to hold onto something.

"This isn't wrong, Cas," Dean suddenly said. He looked up, right into Castiel's beautiful blue eyes.

"This is entirely right." Cas smiled. He had lived for thousands of years, yet nothing had ever felt this perfect.