Prologue
"Where have you been?" I shrieked as my bestfriend cara came in.I had a plastic cup full of ice inmy hand and a green gown on, my normal clothes tossed over a chair in the corner."I'm freaking out here,Cara,and you just vanish into thin air."
"I did not vanish,"she said gently."I was calling katy and handeling things at the front desk.i'm here now."
"Well good,"I said."Because i really need-"And then I stopped talking and sat up straight, holding my stomach.I made a low, guttural moaning sound, rising and rising louder and louder, and Cara just stared at me, not even recognizing my face, and knew all at once that she was way in over her head.
The door opened behind her and the doctor came in, all cheerful and easygoing, taking her time walking up to the bed while i huffed and puffed and grabbed cara's hand, which I immediately squeezed so hard I left her bone meeting bone, crunching.
"so,"the doctor said easily, grabbing a chart off the end of the bed."Looks like we're having a baby."
"Looks that way,"I said between gasps."can I have some drugs, please?"
"In a minute,"the doctor said, moving to the end of the bed and lifting the sheet, moving my legs into the stirrups attached to the side of the bed."Let's see how far along you are."
She poked and prodded, and I ground the bones in Cara's hand to powder.
"Okay,"the doctor said, patting the sheet back down,"We're getting close. It shouldn't be too long now,so I just need you to relax,and work your breathing with your partner here.Leave the rest to us".
"What about the drugs?" I said urgently."Can I get the drugs?"
"I'll send someone in shortly," the docter said,smiling like we were cute. "Don't worry,honey. I'll be over before you know it". She slipped the chart back into it's place on the end of the bed, tucking her pen behind her ear, and walked out the door.
"I hate her," I said decisively through a mouthful of Ice."I mean it"
"Lets do our breathing,"She suggested,pulling a chair up behind the bed. "Deep breath in,now,okay?"
"I don't want to breathe," I snapped at her. " I want them to knock me out,completely,even if they just hit me on the head with something. I can't do this,Cara.I can't."
"Yes, you can," she said sternly."We're ready for this."
"Easy for you to say." I sucked down more ice. " All you have to do is tell me to breathe and stand there. You've got the easy part".
"Mischa. Hold it together".
I rose up in the bed,spitting frozen shards everywhere.
"Don't tell me to hold it together,not until you have felt this pain,because it is unlike anything-" And then i stopped talking,my face going pale again as another contraction hit.
"Breathe,"she said,doing it herself, puff puff puff, in hale deep,puff puff puff. " come on".
But I wasn't breathing, only moaning again, that low scary noice that made her back away from the bed, literally scared for her life.She was wrong. We weren't ready for this. this was big,and scary,and she understood how I felt,wozzy and terreified all at once. I best she wishes she was in the waiting room,with the boy scouts and the candy machine,pacing and witing to light up a cigar.
"Stay here," she said to me ,backing away from the bed,step by step,as I stopped moaning suddenly and watched her,eyes wide."I'll be-"
"Don't leave!" I cried trying to sit up straight, reaching for the sides of the bed."Cara,don't-"
