This is incrediply crappy. I was feeling really horrible and so this is what happened. I wrote a horribly writen piece of depressing shit that I haven't even re-read. So...sorry.
“I can’t do this anymore.” I whispered into my phone at her.
“Yes you can. Don’t ever say that.” Jess said. I could hear the worry and determination in her voice.
I sighed and we were both silent for a minute. I didn’t want to upset her anymore.
“I’m really sorry but I have to go… I have an assignment due tomorrow that I haven’t even started yet. I love you.”
“Okay, have fun. I love you to B.” I smiled at that. She was the only one that called me B, everyone else called me Brianna.
“Bye.” I said and then hung up.
I’ve been trying for so long, trying to stay strong for Jess.
But I can’t do it anymore.
I knew nobody was going to be home for hours.
It’s the perfect time. No chance of anyone walking in on me.
I already had everything I needed.
I was ready.
Tonight is the night.
I put my iPod into the dock and turned it up as high as it would go. I started singing along to one of my favourite songs by Black Veil Brides; Lost It All.
“Then I lost it all, dead and broken my, backs against the wall, cut me open…”
I walked around, gathering everything I needed and putting into to place. When I was ready, I climbed onto the chair, placing the noose around my neck.
I stood there for a few minutes, just thinking over everything that had led me to this decision. I could hear all the voices of my tornmenters in my head,
“You’re fat”
You’re ugly.”
“Faggot.”
“Slut.”
“Emo freak. Why don’t you go kill yourself?”
I guess by doing this I was giving them what they wanted, but I didn’t care anymore.
I just wanted it all to end. And I was making it.
I adjusted the nose then slowly stepped off the chair kicking it out from under me.
