lover

first part

We are two lovers everyday. We're slowly drifting apart. We were so connected at the beginning but now we're drifting so far apart. We don't even stay at the same house anymore. You found another wife and I'm sitting here alone. Crying my eyes out and I don't know what to do. Sometimes I feel like nothing ever matters anymore for me, but it does. So I am trying my best to stay calm each day. I feel like nothing ever matters and I feel like I'm just a lonely goose and no one ever wants to date me anymore but people say that's not true. My friend says that's not true. My family says it's not true but I feel like it is. I haven't been with a male for almost 2 years now. I feel like every single person I meet. They hate me automatically. They don't even trust how I feel. They don't even know how I feel but they go their separate ways. Anyway. I try not to scream and shout every day but I do it anyway because it makes me feel better. But each day I remember that I'm not special and that I just need to listen to the words that I'm saying and what I need to know. But I just want to let it all out. I want to punch him straight in the face. He knew better than to let me go. He knew it. He knew I still loved him very much but he did it at a jealous because they knew I was getting all the attention from the guys and wanted to cheat on me. I told him it's over but I want to push him away. I never cheated on him and I never will. I just don't know what to do now. No one ever wants to date me ever again because of the sense was the person bad for this? I don't know. Sometimes it just feels lonely and empty inside maybe I can make it right. Maybe not we'll never know. Has the days gone over and over? I keep going lonely and lonely each day. I feel like no one ever would want to be with someone like me. Most of the people I used to know are coming ugly and fab because I look ugly but they don't know why I have emotions too they don't know what I grow through everyday and what I used to go through. It feels like I'm a burden in my house but I'm not. Everyone loves me but most of the people hate me. Can you subscribe to what you feel like everyday because I feel lonely and scared and frustrated and departed from him not too long ago.
    

                                                                2013
                                                        Words 468