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A STORY by -CHXSHIYA
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HYUNG LINE VER.
yeojin I need some help with my homework, taerae. taerae: What's the assignment? yeojin: I'm supposed to write a paper that presents both sides of an issue and then defends one of the arguments. taerae: What's your issue? yeojin: That's the problem. I can't think of anything to argue. taerae: That's hard to believe. yeojin: I'm always right and everybody else is always wrong! What's to argue about?!
hao: yeojin, what does IDK, ILY, and TTYL mean? yeojin: I don't know, I love you, talk to you later. hao: Alright, I love you too, I'll ask matthew. yeojin: Wait- hao, no-
matthew, texting group chat: What flavour of ice cream do you guys want? I'm at the store so be quick! yeojin: Moose Tracks is good! jiwoong: What the fuck is that!? yeojin: *Gasp* How dare you insult moo- jiwoong: No. No no not that. What the hell. Why do you spell flavor like flavour. It's like you have flavor but then this guy shows up and is like "Oui Oui Would you like chocolate flaVOUR or vanilla flaVOUR. matthew and yeojin: what? jiwoong: I don't get it why add the EXTRA u when it's PERFECTLY FINE AS IT IS!? matthew: You done now? jiwoong: Yeah ok. matthew and yeojin: ... jiwoong: ...Can I have the Mint Chocolate chip flavour?
yeojin: Good morning. As you begin your day, remember that violence is always an option and often the answer. hao: yeojin: hao: ...Please, go back to bed.
matthew: When I said bring me something back from the beach I meant like a conch shell! yeojin: *Struggling to hold a seagull* Fucking say that next time!
hao: Fine! Judge all you want but... hao, points at matthew: Married a lesbian. hao, points at taerae: Left a man at the altar. hao, points at yeojin: Fell in love with a gay ice dancer. hao, points at hanbin: Threw a girl's wooden leg in a fire. hao, points at jiwoong: Lives in a box!
hao: Hey, what have you two been doing? taerae: we were helping jiwoong with their wedding vows and we were kicked out of their house for making it inappropriate. yeojin: How is "Nice ass, matthew" inappropriate?
taerae, teaching yeojin to drive: Okay, you're driving and jiwoong and hao walk into the road. Quick, what do you hit? yeojin: Oh, definitely jiwoong. I could never hurt hao. taerae, massaging their temples: The brakes. You hit the brakes.
yeojin: Good. Thanks, dad. hao: You just called jiwoong "dad". You just said "thanks, dad." yeojin: What? No, I didn't. I said "thanks, man". jiwoong: Do you see me as a father figure, yeojin? yeojin: No. If anything I see you as a bother figure 'cause you're always bothering me. hanbin: Hey! Show your father some respect!
yeojin: You don't need my blessing to go kiss jiwoong. In fact, I was pretty sure you were already kissing jiwoong! matthew: Nope. yeojin: In that case, as the archbishop of matthew's fully awakened gaydom, I give you my blessing to immediately leave and rectify that as soon as possible! Go now, my child, and kiss jiwoong right on the lips!!!
