Insecure

Part 1

Notti Pov
6:30 a.m.
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My alarm went off indicating that it's time for school, it's my first day here actually. We're originally from San Francisco and just moved to New York, so I'm actually kinda nervous but excited at the same time.

I went in the bathroom and brushed my teeth and washed my face, and I was going to wear my hair down but I didn't. The thing is that I put my hair into different styles n stuff but when I look at it a second time I hate it, so I just pull it back in a ponytail.

My hair is one of my insecurities, I just don't like it that much and I don't wanna cut it off because Ik that'll just make it worse, my other one is my weight, and my biggest one is my face, I've had a bunch of people tell me I look good but I just don't see it, then other people used to bully me for some reason. I just hope that people in New York are a little better.

I was gonna wear something not too plain but not something that sticks out too much So I went to my drawer and found a black tee with some Jeans and a red graphic hoodie,a hat, and some white forces, but I looked at myself and started second guessing, now I didn't like it at all so I picked out a super casual outfit then I made up my bed and went downstairs.

Sometimes I wonder what if I didn't second guess myself all the time... but I just can't stop..

"Let's go we driving to school today-...nigga...wtf happened to your outfit you picked out for today ?" Jay said.

"I put it back because I didn't like it anymore.."

"Well yo ahh not going to school looking like that, get yo ahh over here." He's said walking with me upstairs.

He went inside my closet and got that same outfit out and my black Air Forces.

"Now you gone wear ts weather you like it or not, because yo ahh look homeless. And if you don't fix this damn ponytail and put yo black ski on top."

I really appreciate Jay for helping me try to look presentable but he just doesn't understand how bad there's insecurities are, but I'll wear for him.

Everyone in my family knew how bad my insecurities were and they tried to make me feel better but it never worked. We walked to our car and put our backpack n stuff in the back seat.

"Oh and next week I'm not riding with yall to school." Dd said

"Why?"

"Because, I wanna see what the bus like."

"Its probably filled with loud and obnoxious people." I said

"It probably got hoes on there tho." He said

"Are hoes all you care about?"

"Are niggas all you care about?" He said.

Also I forgot to mention that I was gay but now yk.💀

Soon we arrived at the school and already I could tell it was wayy different than San Francisco. It was a tad bit smaller but it was still big. We walked inside and went to the office to get our schedules and mfs were looking at us mad funny.

"This school is very different from Frisco." Dd said as we walked down the hallway looking around.

"Yeah, and much smaller too." Jay addd

"Anyways I'm gonna go find my class before the bell rings and before I get lost." I said

"Ight."

I walked upstairs down the hallways until I eventually found my class room.

"Oh you must be the new student?" The teacher said standing outside the door.

"I am actually."

"What's your name?"