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A STORY by -CHXSHIYA
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www.lifeofkeira.com
PERFORMANCE TEAM VER !
minghao: keira, you're offered 500,000 dollars, but, if you accept it, the person you hate the most in the world gets 1,000,000 dollars. Would you take it? keira: Of course! I mean, why wouldn't I want 1,500,000 dollars?
dino: minghao, what if there are monsters? keira: Don't worry, we're top of the food chain. Much later... dino, lying awake at night: I am the monster.
dino: *is hugging keira* hoshi: Hey! It's my turn to hug keira! hoshi: *grabs keira* jun: *kicking down the door* What do you mean, "yOuR tUrN"? We agreed now is my time slot! dino: No, It's still my turn! keira: *suffocating* Guys, I love you, but just because I'm the smallest doesn't mean you can be hugging me constantly! hoshi: But we need the moral support! dino: And you're small! Which is cute! jun: If I don't hug you right now I think the depression will kick in and my body will stop functioning. keira: *close to tears* Well- I, I guess.
keira: Firstly, how dare you use mathematics to make me look stupid! keira: I'm actually very good at mathematics. keira: Thirdly, I think you might be right.
hoshi: That was so hot, keira. keira: I literally called the person who just flirted with you a degenterate dog and told them I hope they get dragged through the streets. hoshi: I'm so in love with you.
keira: *shatters a window and climbs through it* keira: *turns around and helps minghao through it* Breaking and entering is wrong minghao. minghao: Okay.
dino: Ah, yes. Here we have a beautiful couple... jun: I really care about your feelings! minghao: I really care about YOUR feelings! dino, turning their head: ...and then there's the disaster couple... hoshi: YOU NEED TO PAY MORE ATTENTION TO ME INSTEAD OF BEING AT THE HOSPITAL! keira: I WOULDN'T HAVE TO SPEND SO MUCH TIME AT THE HOSPITAL IF YOU STOPPED INSISTING ON FIGHTING EVERYONE WHO COMES WITHIN A FIVE FOOT RADIUS OF YOU!
dino: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast? hoshi: Several traffic violations. jun: Three counts of resisting arrest. keira: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks. minghao: Also, that's not our car.
hoshi: Who would you kill out of the four of us, dino? dino: keira, easily. keira, laughing: What the fuck, man. dino: Well, jun would be too easy. They'd probably be into it. jun, now standing in the doorway: What the fuck, man!?
dino: I sleep with a gun under my pillow. minghao: I sleep with a knife. keira: Both of you are pathetic. dino: Oh yeah? What do you sleep with? keira: ...hoshi.
hoshi: How do I ask someone out? dino: Roses are red, violets are blue, guess what, my bed has room for two. hoshi: No! keira: Twinkle twinkle little star, we can do it in a car. hoshi: Stop! minghao: Row, row, row your boat gently down the stream, merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily I can make you scream. hoshi: I feel like the last one is verging dangerously into serial killer territory.
keira: Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming? minghao: Can everyone in this godforsaken group please learn the skill called "Think Before You Speak"? hoshi: Ya know... it might be.
dino: Why is everyone so obsessed with top or bottom? Honestly, I'd just be excited to have a bunk bed. minghao: minghao: I'm gonna tell him. hoshi: Don't you dare.
keira: Plants are basically the ideal friends. They are quiet, friendly, and easy to please. All they need is a little water and fresh earth, and they are perfectly happy to lie there all day in the sun. And they don't make increasingly awful life choices, or hide their relationships. They have never, as far as I know, fucked a bee.
