𝐓𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 || 𝐉𝐢𝐡𝐚𝐧

V

Jeonghan doesn’t get pregnant.

It’s silly to think he would’ve after a single try, but Joshua still feels disappointed when Jeonghan calls a week later with the news. He can tell the omega is thinking the same, but he’s certainly a lot better at masking it; Joshua is thankful, because in a way, having Jeonghan's pragmatic way of finding a new date and not dwelling on it makes him feel a bit better about it.

Still, it doesn’t change the fact that in the following weekend, they’ll have to try again, and that’s somehow even more daunting than doing it the first time. Even though there wasn’t any lingering awkwardness from their first attempt, Joshua still feels weird about it — all in all, he’s pretty certain that it wasn’t the ideal experience for either of them. Whenever they hang out together, even after that, it’s always easy and comfortable; they’re best friends after all. It doesn’t feel right to have those moments be so unlike what they are together.

Three days before the weekend, he’s beggining to feel really restless; the thought of repeating that atmosphere of awkwardness for numerous occasions until they make this baby doesn’t sit right with him, and frankly, he’s afraid it’ll eventually affect their friendship as well. So, against all of his good judgement, Joshua invites Wonwoo and Ten for lunch and decides any advice is better than no advice at all.

“So, I need your help.” He brings it up once they’re already halfway through their meal. Wonwoo perks up with half a chicken wing inside his mouth, but Ten looks like he was expecting it. “With uh, my situation with Jeonghan.”

“Do you want the birds and bees?” Ten coos, mocking.

Joshua throws a fry at him. “Shut up, I’m seriously sweating about this. Did Jeonghan say anything about how it went, our first time?”

“Not with details, because he’s boring.” Ten huffs. “But he did say it was a bit stiff.”

Having the words said out loud to him is a lot bigger of a blow to Joshua's pride than he would’ve thought, even if deep down he obviously knew — it’s just one thing for him to think and another to know Jeonghan has been definitely thinking them too. “That’s one way to put it, I guess.”

“Well, since no one tells me shit ,” Wonwoo interrupts, licking his fingers. “Can someone explain what happened?”

Joshua swears them both to secrecy, and then relays what happened that night. He doesn’t want to expose Jeonghan's privacy, of course, so he makes sure to leave out any compromising details that aren’t about himself; still, it’s enough that they get the gist of how it all went down. The reactions are more or less what he expected, too: both of them stare at Joshua with barely concealed disappointment and exasperation.

“So you’re telling me you guys didn’t even kiss ?” Ten asks, and then makes a pained noise when Joshua is silent. “You’re such disappointments. Seriously, just get over yourselves.”

“Exactly, man. You’ve both known each other since you were what? Five? So why are you acting like he’s just a random omega that happens to be having your baby?”

“That’s not how I’m acting, you know Jeonghan is more than that.” Joshua frowns, defensive. “But I didn’t want to cross any boundaries and make him uncomfortable. We’re trying for a baby, not having sex.”

“Newsflash, dumbass: the way to make a baby is through sex. What you guys did was sex, it just happened to be bad sex.” Ten huffs, rolling his eyes. “If you’re already doing it, might as well do it right and make it good for the both of you.”

Wonwoo laughs at Ten’s outburst, but talks to Joshua with more patience. “Listen, you guys want to raise a kid together, right? Think of how much communication that will require. So, start practicing it by talking to Jeonghan and asking what he wants, and then figure out a way you can make this thing better for both of you, dude.”

Joshua nods, thoughtful, and then chews on his fries. He knows they’re both right, but it doesn’t make it less awkward to think of bringing it up. Ten seems to read his mind, because the younger reaches across the table to rub a thumb in the creases of his best friend’s forehead. “Stop overthinking this, Josh. It doesn’t have to be complicated if you don’t make it so, alright?"

Joshua sits on this advice for a few days, and by the time he’s walking into Jeonghan's apartment the following Saturday, he’s already talked himself into saying something. They were right: Jeonghan is the single most comfortable person Joshua has in his life, if only because they’ve been through every single embarrassing phase of their lives together, and it’s just silly to let something like this get in the way of such an important moment.

“I showered ahead this time,” Jeonghan says once Joshua has taken off his shoes and they’ve gotten the greetings out of the way. “And I was thinking maybe we could order in from that thai place afterwards? I’m really craving some Tom Yum Goong.”

“Is this a preview for when you get actual cravings?” Joshua asks, amused.

“Well, Taeyong used to eat watermelon dipped into barbecue sauce when he was pregnant with Jisung, so I think you’ll be dealing with a lot worse than delicious seafood soup.” Jeonghan snorts.

The older is already leading towards the bedroom before Joshua can get any word out about what he planned to say, and it seems like the omega might be trying in his own way to make it less awkward by at least dealing with it in a more casual manner. It’s an improvement, especially when Jeonghan closes the door behind them and doesn’t look like he’s about to flee, but the way he still doesn’t properly look at Joshua as he fusses over his bedspread and the bottle of lube on the comforter isn’t ideal in any way.

It’s all moving too fast, and Joshua only gets the courage to say something when Jeonghan is already climbing onto the mattress, and he realizes it’ll be too late to speak properly in just a minute. “Hey, Hannie, can we just talk for a second before…?”

Jeonghan stops for a second, looking back at Joshua like a deer in headlights. The alpha only smiles at him, tries to make clear that this isn’t necessarily a bad conversation, and Jeonghan relaxes a little, enough so that he sits down on the bed properly, Joshua taking the spot next to him. “Sure, is everything alright?”

“Yeah, just...” Joshua tries to form the words in his mind. “I don’t know about you, but for me, after last time it just didn’t feel… right. I was wondering if maybe it was alright with you if we took slower, and like, less… awkward?”

Jeonghan laughs shortly at that, and there’s a tension that bleeds out from his shoulder and shows the alpha that he’s relieved to have it brought up, too. “I know… I think we were too worried about making things weird, so we made it weird.”

“Exactly.” Joshua chuckles, glancing sideways at his best friend. “I didn’t want to cross any boundaries with you so I just thought I should ask this time. Is it ok if I… touch you? And kiss you, that stuff.”

Joshua feels fourteen talking to his first omega girlfriend when the words heat up his own face, but he’s at least glad he’s not alone when Jeonghan lets out a flustered laugh that the older knows very well. “Yeah… yeah, I think I’d like that.”

There’s a new set of nerves that build up at the base of Joshua's stomach, but he reminds himself of his friends’ advice and tries not to overthink it. He focuses on what he knows, turning around properly so that he’s facing Jeonghan on the bed, and then takes a second to gaze at the omega in front of him: gorgeous, with blushing skin, bright round eyes and lips parting softly in anticipation.

His hand is confident as he cups Jeonghan's cheek, and the older doesn’t startle at the intimate gesture, only swallows visibly. Joshua leans forward, as slowly as he can as to give Jeonghan any chance to back away if he so wants, but the omega doesn’t — they hover over each other, so close he can feels Jeonghan's breath on his lips.