Rough life, Just Like the Sea (Discontinued)

Chapter one

Tw: Yelling, self harm, panic attack????, blood. Let me know If I missed anything-

*Ranboo's pov*

What was my life right now....

Getting yelled at by these caretakers, and for what? I was just getting yelled at to be yelled at this point, i'm a failure in this place, well that's what everyone tells me at least.

My eyes water, I shrink in more on myself, letting this happen.

"Do you understand me Markus!?" She yelled, I nodded quickly. She always yells that name at me, was she referring to me? Most likely, the staff are the only people who refer to me with that name,  I don't even go by that name myself.

I go by Ranboo, after I misspelled the word 'rainbow' by accident and people just used it to make fun of me, but I kinda liked it, it felt like me, not this 'Markus' person people always associate me with.

I was broken from my train of tough by my hair being pulled roughly, making me snap my eyes open and stare at the women in front of me. I may not be into women, but my god is she ugly up close, her breath stinks, possibly by something from earlier today, she was an older women, wrinkles all over her face, maybe she was beautiful when she was younger, but now... Age did not do her justice for what it did.

"Ugh you stupid child!!" Another tug on my hair, making me whimper in pain.

 "Why can't you do anything right!" She basically through me to the ground, other children were watching from the other room, laughing and giggling at me, finding my pain amusing to them, like I was some silly television, the orphanage never had one, so I guess I was the replacement for that, since it seemed like that I was a cartoon for them to watch. 

Tears were streaming down my face, I couldn't control them as they fell from my face, silent sobs escaped my mouth. 

I felt so humiliated, I hung my head low, I now they are pointing at me, I can hear their laughing, it only seemed to get louder around me, my vision started to blur, my breath picked up and became heavy. Not now... please not now, why now, why is everything getting so much louder.... Or is it getting quieter, everything is so overwhelming at the moment

"---- ---- ----" Was someone trying to talk to me? My brain can't focus on anything at the moment. I felt something harshly grab my hair and pull me up, now dragging me, my breathing seemed to pick up more.

What's happening? Where are we going? Im going to die.... Aren't I? My brain raced through a billion thoughts at once, confused on where we're going.

I was thrown into a room, since I felt my body crash onto the floor, the hard and cold floors. More yelling was heard, I couldn't understand any of it, there was now a ringing sound in my ear.

"You little brat, stay in here, you don't get to come out for a week, maybe listen to your elders before ignoring them" That was the only thing I manage to hear before the door slammed shut and a locking sound was heard in the room.

I manage to sit up, stumbling as I crawled to the door, beginning to pound on it, my little fait sobs where heard, along with the pounding on the door. Everything in my body hurt, my lungs hurt, my head hurt, I wanted to leave this room, it started to become to tight and constricting, like it was hard to breath.

My body started to give up, I just slid down the door, quiet sobs left my mouth... so room was now silent, with only thoughts to keep me company....

'Ꭵ 𝐓Øᒪ𝓭 𝔂Øย 𝐍Ø Ø𝐍𝑒 Ć𝐚я𝑒𝓭' A voice said, I tried to ignore it.

'ץØย Ⓚ𝐍Ø𝔀 𝔀𝓱𝐚𝐓 𝔂Øย 𝔀𝐚𝐍𝐓 𝐓Ø 𝓭Ø' I said, it's voice dark and echoy, 

I whimpered. 'No, your wrong!' I thought back, I didn't want to add to the many scars on my body, some new, some old, it's clear that most of them were purposeful, ment stay there for a long time, to remained me all my mistakes.

'𝓭Ø Ɨ𝐓 ⓡ𝐚𝐍๒ØØ' It demanded. 

My arm reached out, there was ironically one of my sharp blades on the floor next to me, it hurt to move, but I still reached and grabbed it. I shifted a bit,  just so I can reach my other arm properly. My breathing steadied slightly as I placed the blade on my arm and swiped down, it stung a bit, but the one turned into 2, 2 turned into 6, 6 turned into so much more, I kept going until there was so much blood going down my arm.

I wondered how im even alive that this, I bet no one would care if I did die, clearly, they locked me in here without a care. I don't even remember what I did wrong, something stupid, something to piss off one of the care workers. I dropped the blade, to weak to carry on. 

I was bleeding out on the fucking ground, this is where I die.... on the floor, a cold, dirty floor.

Someone will find me and I would already be dead.

*Click*

Is someone actually coming in? My body didn't move, black dots started to appear in my vision, I felt something hit my back, making me whimper quietly, it hurt slightly.

My breathing slowed as my eyes begin to shut.

I felt someone pick me up calling out my name.

But I passed out before I can hear anything else.

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921 words!

New story, because im bored and why not, and because I stopped writing my Tubbo adoption au (Since I stopped really watching Tubbo) I decided to make it up and write this!

So im sad start.... like more sad then a normal adoption au-

But I hope you liked it and are excited to read more whenever I post!

I think that's all.

Have a nice day/night!

Love you, bye!! 💕