12 things

sorry for any typos i don't feel like editing this and i also don't have a cover for it but hey

thing #1

i do not, nor will i ever, know everything.

I will never, not even if I live to be 108, know everything. I think you learn to accept that when you're a teenager. Being a teenager is weird. We get stuffed into a building with other angry teenagers where we learn about things we should but do not care about, and then when they kick us out, we have no idiea what we're doing, and, of course, we still do not know everything.

thing #2

do nice things for people.

As a freshman, i wrote lots of notes to people who looked like they could use a pick-me-up. One of the things they tell you in those "20 THINGS ALL FRESHMAN SHOULD KNOW!!!!" videos on YouTube is to not try to be friends with every single person, so I decided that maybe writing to people would be less freshmanny than talking to them about things they don't care about. I mean it probably wasn't, but I had good intentions. I was told after giving someone a letter that it was "the nicest thing anyone had ever done for them." If you've ever been told that after doing something for someone,  you'll know that it feels like a ray of sunshine just exploded inside of you.  it's pretty cool. also, if you see someone wearing a twenty one pilots shirt and you're like OMFG I LOVE TWENTY ONE PILOTS in your head, please tell them that you like their shirt. give people compliments, but please mean it.

thing #3

you never fully know someone because you are never in their mind.

I learned that when the people around me annoyed me or said something I didn't agree with, it was best for me not to speak up. I tried to help people that came to me with problems that I thought had obvious solutions. I never yelled at people who said that writing and poetry were stupid. I never screamed in a certain girl's face that love is 99% of the time not real in high school. You never fully know someone, so maybe the safest road to take would be to go with it and do something productive with it instead of cause conflict.

thing #4

when it gets hard, prepare for it to get harder and do not complain too much*

I though first semester was bad. Second semester was by far the worst semester I have ever had in my whole 15 years on Earth,which isn't a lot, but still, it absolutely sucked. There were ups but there were far more downs, and I learned that feeling alone doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. Also, if you ever get the sinking feeling, know that it's okay to cry on your bed. Though second semester was the worst, I feel ready if it is to get worse-er in the future.

*there is a difference between complaining and needing someone to talk with. never feel guilty for talking to someone, ever. learn to know the difference between complaining and having a helpful conversation with a friend who cares.

thing #5

know the difference between people who are around you and people who are your friends. 

The absolute most terrifying moment of this year was realizing that everyone around me was everyone around me. That's it. None of the people I had called friends were my actual friends, and I knew it would happen, but I thought maybe there was one person who was my actual friend. There wasn't. They're all toxic people that I wish I could get away from, but sixth grade me go involved with EVERYONE, so it's hard for me to get EVERYONE out of my life. Not literally everyone, just EVERYONE.