Miserable (You and Me)

Miserable

"Funny what you're thinking, where are you?

Who's in your head right now, someone other than me

Looking for somebody, ayy, oh"

Jisung sighed, staring up at his ceiling. He couldn't shut off his brain, and now it was border lining an anxiety attack. He knew the signs, he knew what to do, he's done this a thousand times. 

'Focus on your breathing, nice slow deep breaths.'

It worked enough that he could sit up right, keeping his eyes closed while he continued. A few minutes later he felt better. Well, better than he did. Well enough to swing his legs off the side of his bed and head to the kitchen for water.

It was lonelier than he ever imagined it would be, despite always complaining about having to share dorms when they had to. The rooms seemed so much larger at night, in the dark, when you're alone versus in the day with friends. Jisung padded into the kitchen, eyes squinting in the dark towards the refrigerator. A dim light from the fridge cast over a familiar face, and Jisung sucked in his breath. Minho was already in the fridge, looking confused as Jisung stopped in the entry way.

"What are you doing up, Sungie?" Minho asked softly, shutting the fridge, a water bottle and an orange in his hand. Jisung swallowed hard, forcing a smile. He could feel his heart start racing again, and he instantly felt annoyed with himself. 

'Pull yourself together, it's just Minho.'

"Could ask you the same thing, Minho hyung." He regained his composure and walked over to the fridge. "Just needed a drink." He answered as he grabbed a water bottle and shut the refrigerator door behind him. Jisung turned on his heel back towards his bedroom, opening his bottle and taking a sip before hearing Minho speak again.

"Hey, are you alright?" Minho had taken two long strides and found himself at Jisung's side, hand on his shoulder, his voice hinting concern. Jisung inhaled through his nose as he put the lid back on his bottle and turned to face Minho, but wasn't expecting him to be so close. 

"Y-yeah, 'course.  Why?" Jisung's reply was softer than he expected it to be, but he was practically breathless with Minho so close to him. Even in the dark, Jisung could see his top teeth gently resting on his bottom lip as his brown eyes scanned Jisung's face, concerned. He could feel his heart start to race and his pulse in his ears; he needed to get back to his room, now. 

Minho didn't seem convinced, but released his hand from Jisung's shoulder and walked ahead of him a few steps, back towards the hall where his bedroom was. Minho turned his dorm light on, causing Jisung to squint again trying to adjust to the light.

"Just making sure, you've just been weird." Minho paused, leaning against his doorframe now, watching Jisung who was still in the hall. "Well, more than usual." Minho smirked at him. Jisung chuckled nervously, his water bottle free hand suddenly interested in scratching the back of his neck. "Yeah, well. I think I'm just tired. But can't really sleep. I'm fine though, I just-" He paused, taking a step closer to Minho, examining his sleep shirt. It was a familiar black Supreme shirt. "Is that my shirt?"

Minho didn't even look down at the shirt to confirm, he just smirked again and nodded once. "Is that ok? I can give it back to you if you want." He started to remove his arms from the sleeves, shirt rising up enough that Jisung could see his abs ever so slightly. He felt faint.

"Uh no, hang on to it. Really. I just didn't know where it went." Jisung huffed out, glancing down at his feet while Minho readjusted into the shirt. Jisung heard a soft laugh and looked up to see Minho, fully clothed again, staring at him, smiling. Jisung felt the blood creep up his ears.