𝑺 𝑨 𝑳 𝑽 𝑨 𝑻 𝑰 𝑶 𝑵 (18 +)

04•

Sage.

This was the worst night of her life.

The screaming fans, the smell of smoke invading her lungs, and the incessant pushing from over-eager girls who couldn't wait to get a glimpse of Ezra. If she wasn't afraid of getting kicked out, she'd already have started a brawl before the concert started. She didn't like being pushed and proper etiquette didn't just disappear because you were at a concert. An Ezra Lincoln concert no less.

"They're coming out soon," Jules gently nudged Sage in the arm. The stage grew darker and suddenly she was riddled with a wave of nausea.

Five years.

Five years since she'd last seen him.

Five years since his brother cheated on her.

Five years since she sat crying at his door.

Five years since her family embarrassingly fell apart.

Five years free of Ezra Lincoln.

But now he was back and the city reeked of him. Sage couldn't go half a mile down the street to get a burger without hearing his name. She heard it so much sometimes he popped up in her dreams and that was the very last place she wanted him. In her head. Getting under her skin was a specialty of his and she knew that if he saw her tonight he'd never let her live it down. Julian would never let her live it down so it was best she kept her eyes to the floor. The Front row didn't allow her much if any privacy so she'd just have to settle with the former.

"Portland are you ready!?" A young man with Sandy brown hair and tattooed knuckles came running onto the stage with a guitar in hand. A pick sat in between his teeth that he swiped his tongue across before testing the chords.

"I don't think they're ready," The crowd cheered even louder when another band member stepped out dressed in a black t-shirt with the sleeves cut out and even more tattoos littered across his biceps. He was the taller one of the two with dreads down to his shoulder and what looked to be a piercing on the right side of his nose.

"That's Cole and Corbin," Julian shouted somewhere near my ear. "Cole is one of the guitarists obviously and Corbin is on the drums." She nodded her head, her gaze still stuck on center stage. A spotlight shone on a lone mic that was sure to be Ezra's. A cold chill climbed up the base of her neck making her cough. She was sick with regret, a pummeling feeling that brought about the beginnings of an anxiety attack.

Sage avoided all things anxiety-inducing. She hated the heart-pounding, end-of-the-world feeling that would build in the pits of her stomach. Ideas of death and what came after ransacked her thoughts—sometimes she thought she was dying but her therapist told her that was normal. She also told her to let the panic happen to show her body she wasn't afraid but how could she not be? It was the most frightening feeling in the world and Sage would avoid it at all costs. Even if it made the next one worse.

"I don't think we heard you, Portland make some noise!" Another member ran out onto the stage and sat at the piano. She didn't need Julian to tell her who the boy with golden hair and permanent dark circles was. The one who always high-fived her when she'd come to visit Nick. He was arguably the sweetest thing she'd ever met, too sweet to be friends with Ezra but maybe that's why they got along so well. Matt liked soft notes and multicolored skies. Ezra liked scotch and forgetting where he was the next morning. They were night and day. The moon creeping into the sky while the sun had an hour left.

"This last one coming out is Monroe. He's on vocals alongside Ezra," Jules pointed to the stage and clapped his hands together. Monroe always had a solo during one of Ezra's sets. A song of his choosing that he'd write for each stop on their tour. Jules kept track of every one of them, swearing it would be Sage's favorite part of the show. She wouldn't get her hopes up, but she kept that to herself. She swore she wouldn't be insufferable tonight, the only promise she wasn't sure she could keep.