It was the year that I graduated from elementary school that I first met her. Black curls, dark skin, easy smile……a typical athletic girl. Unlike most Chinese girls who were shy to their wits of speaking to strangers, she greeted me by my name the instant we made eye contact. Then, I realized that she was the weird girl from the class next door in my sixth-year homeroom. Also, she knew me as the American Boy. A few days later, the two of us were in our soon-to-be middle school, checking out the place, filling up the enrollment slips, etc. Little did I know that she would affect the following two years. She was known as Michelle.
We made if to Class one, the elite class in our grade. The pressure came from everywhere, teachers thrusted their schedules before us, parents rose their expectations with every passing exam, the competition between students raged on like an eternal war. Other classmates were brilliant, competing for the top rank of the school. In such pressures like this, it’s quite hard to see a way through your fears. Before I knew it, the two of us were relying on each other for emotional support. A friendship blossomed as days passed reinforced by the fear of losing ourselves in the pressure. Our bond wasn’t like the pleasant friendship that flourished as days passed, but one that enslaved us like chains. But without it, the two of us would plummet into the bottomless pit of our fears as we lost each other.
After a month we met, I told her that I had a girlfriend, so she was somewhere between a GF and BFF. Sadly, for her, I already had candidates for the two positions. As expected, her face immediately dropped whenever I spoke of them.
You must know that I am the type of person who easily attracts other, but I can’t stand being in the same crowd for too long. Michelle is a normal girl that can’t stand being lonely.
With completely opposite personalities, it was easy of us to disband hard to come together again. Pride is my power and flaw; she was caught on the dark side of it. I took for granted. She had a tough time.
The breaking point was when I finally left and conjured up a new lot. One day, as I was walking in the middle of my newly formed lot down the center of the hallway, someone popped out, “Hey Leon, where’s Michelle?”
I shrugged. “Does it matter?”
Little did I know she was tailing the crowd.
I didn’t get to see her face, but I could face guessed her expression. With that, I lost her trust in my arrogance and her friendship in my pride.
I was and idiot.
An atmosphere of Artic lands then covered our conversations from then on, one day she passed a note to me that simply expressed how much disappointment and anger she had in me. I got rash and started spreading rumor about her through my crowd, and they passed the anger on to the rest of the class. Michelle was immediately the most unpopular person in our class. Deeper and deeper she fell as I started conquering trust of our mutual friends, tearing apart her last haven as I went. She struck the bottom of the pit as I bester her 36 to 4 as we ran for the class leader. A howl of laughter exploded as she walked off stage, followed by jeers of “Who does she think she is?” With charisma at max, I left her in the dust after passing the major exam that secured my path to my ideal high school; whereas she flunked and began preparing for the second test three months later.(There are two major exams to get into high school. If one did well enough on the first one, they don’t need to take the second one)
We went to different high schools, I went to TYSH, she went to JL. Sometimes I still ran into her on the way to the train station where all the buses dropped students for school. In tenth grade I saw her time from time, sometimes we interacted like strangers, and other times she scurried away whenever she saw my face.
How can I make good from that part of my past? I have no idea, but from then on, I learned to cherish my friends instead of treating them as flanks. Friendship isn’t built because of one person’s charm; it’s the bond between two peoples’ souls. It’s a pity that I didn’t see that earlier, or I would have had a complete middle school life, one without missing pieces. Michelle meant a lot to me, she acted as assistant when I had multiple tasks to accomplish at once like my best friend, she played support when I nearly lost myself like a girlfriend; and mostly, she was there for me every time I asked for her(minus the last part) like a sister. Even now, as I rethink my past, she guides me in social interaction.
Epilogue:
Michelle and I reunited just recently, on the dawn of 2012/11/2, the day I finished writing the above. This time, she did not run.
Arianna, who knew our story, gave a demanding look; I know the face. What it meant was reunion would only be forged if I break the ice.
So I walked over, pumping myself with confidence the whole way.
Michelle game me the sly grin she gave me when we first met.
I gave it right back to her.
