Ashes to Roses

Chapter 1

Whew, here we go. Planning for two years and wrote this one year ago. Posting this here very impulsively. Hoping to hear some good things. please don't hate me xoxo.

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How could a man simultaneously feel wedded and widowed? Arish Arafat wondered as he puffed out another cloud of smoke, the acid burning his lungs. The smoke only carried the intoxicants with it and not the inner turmoil he felt. It was still there inside him, eating him up alive. Arish felt a sense of helplessness he had never known before.

He could only think of his now-enlarged family as he looked across the garden outside the hospital. The people walked across almost ignorant of him. Rather than focusing on them, he decided to focus his attention on the cars moving across the roads. Honking, speeding, and moving without a worry and without any hint of the future events. And at that time, he felt like a car that had been deserted in a blind alley.

"I had told your wife about the complications. It was difficult for her to manage the pregnancy; she was suffering from pre-eclampsia." The doctor's voice reverberated in his ears.

[Pre-eclampsia: a pregnancy complication characterized by high blood pressure and damage to organs]

No matter what he did, he couldn't block out the voice. His Soha was not talking, she was not there to hold their child.

"The pregnancy could cost her her life", came another voice.

Heck, his Soha was dying.

He had been eager for a child. But if he knew about the complications, he would have lived a childless and heirless life. Soha was enough for him. They could have adopted but alas! Soha and her selflessness. It had taken her to her death bed.

He felt a burning sensation on his finger and involuntarily, the cigarette butt, now almost fully burnt, fell down. He crushed it with his shoe. But the weight inside his heart only increased.

"Arish Bhai," Someone whispered.

He turned around to find his wife's confidante. A white shawl shielded her from prying gazes. Exhaustion evident in her hazel brown orbs.

"You holding up okay?" It was a silly question - clearly she wasn't okay. But he didn't know what else to say.

Anyone could notice the dry tears on her cheeks. Nawra managed a half-smile. She nodded, betraying her true emotions.

"The doctor is asking for you," She replied without paying heed to his question.

Her friend-cum-sister was lying almost lifeless on a hospital bed and Nawra wasn't feeling fine at all but she refrained from adding to his troubles as he grappled with his own suffering. Nawra thought as she paced back to the room to attend to the newborn.

As she neared the room, she heard loud crying making her move faster. She hurriedly headed inside the room to find the source. Without any delay, she picked the baby girl and cooed her. After listening to the lullaby, the baby finally went silent and opened her eyes. She stared back at her khala. The black in her eyes only reminded Nawra of her mother. But other than her eyes, she was a carbon copy of her beloved father.

She laid the calm baby down in the crib and went to prepare formula milk for the baby. Just as she finished preparing the bottle, Arish entered the room. Nawra cradled his precious daughter and held the feeding bottle up to her mouth. He watched as his daughter hungrily sucked at the plastic of the nipple, clearly unaware of her parents' condition.

"The doctor says that we can take her home." said Arish.

Nawra was busy, burping the little bundle of joy.