Another's Demise

Brother In Arms

Alara 

I laid against the pillow, the darkness of the night swimming outside of the window, a starless sky. It was fitting the day I had asked Cameron for something, had been a cold night, one with not a glimmer of hope.

There was something cruel about it all, that I knew he was the only one I could trust with this, but I also knew he would take any opportunity to fix what was broken. Was it wrong of me to ask this of him? When I knew he would take it as a road to redemption?

I felt my fingers claw at the fabric of the bed, the motel was as run down thing, the sheets barely keeping out the cold, but I lay there, letting the sensation of wind, bristling over skin, goosebumps running along my arms.

I wanted to feel something, anything other than the pooling dread that followed me.

I wanted to crumble into the walls of this inn, and never be seen again.

Without me there was no Blood diamond.

So, what if I just ceased?

I pushed the thought out, the thundering of my heart, and pounding of my pulse reminding me how very alive I was.

How I needed to stay that way.

I picked up the phone once more, dialling the number of the only person who could understand, "Theo," I whispered down the line.

He answered immediately, but there was something missing in him ever since the death of our father.

"Lara," he whispered back, the shattered voice splintering my already bruised heart, "How are you?"

"Breathing," I responded truthfully, "You?"

"Same."

"I, I didn't see you at the funeral." It must have been the tired night that pushed the question from my thoughts into a reality. Regret seeping into me as soon as I said it.

"I was..." the line went silent, before being filled by a cracked voice, "I couldn't. I didn't believe it. I-"

"It's ok, I, I miss him too," that was the worst of it. Knowing that you shouldn't mourn someone who had destroyed you. That had done everything to make you the person you didn't want to be. The one that had manipulated you your entire life. But even then, Theo and I were raised by Damon, he was our father no matter what anyone convinced us of.

"I feel...I feel so..."

"Empty?"

"Yeah, I should hate him. I did hate him for everything he did to you, what he did to me. But in some way..."

"He loved us," I finished the statement because I knew he couldn't, "In his own twisted way."

For a moment I listened to the sound of his breaths, even, a beating heart still in my brother. The family I needed, my real family.

Him and Ma, that was all I needed.

I didn't need Vincent, I didn't.

Isobel, I needed, Theo I needed, Ma I needed, Cam...

"Where are you?" I murmured, through the quiet.

"With what's left of our gang,"

"But where, no one knows where?" It had been so long since I had seen him in the flesh. We called all the time, but there was something more to it. There was something so daunting about the underworld. One mistake, one betrayal and the whole world would turn. The Mortellos were betrayers.

And by lineage that made him one too.

It didn't matter what I said, what I convinced everyone of.

Theo was a monster just like his father to them.

And it tore at my heart.

He had to go and hide, whilst he was still grieving, whilst he was processing it all. And Theo may have been the strongest person I knew, but there were fractures in that persona, he was breaking, I could feel it.

"Can I come to you?" I asked a futile thing to ask, it would be dangerous he would say. He wouldn't be able to protect me.

"Aren't you at the Falco base?"

"No," I stammered a bit, finding my words, as I sat up, "I'm not there anymore. I can't be. I put everyone in danger."

He let out a low laugh, the first in a lifetime. It warmed my heart, my brother laughing for just a fraction of a moment, I could feel safe in that laughter, "And you want to stay with me? Don't you care that you'd be putting me in danger?"

"Isn't that what sisters are for," I laughed, a trickle of a sound, that echoed in the empty room, "To put their brothers in danger."

"Like the time you pushed me down the hill?"

"I did not- you tripped!" I all but shouted down the line, slumping backwards as laughter filled my lungs.

"So, you lie as well, Alara."

"We all lie," I murmured, and the joy was gone, the solemn truth spreading between us.

"You don't lie Alara, not to deceive. You only lie to protect, and for me that's not a lie."

"Tell, Cameron that," I shouldn't have mentioned him.

"That fucker?" the hatred Theo had for Cameron had begun so early I used to find it funny. But now it was justified, and I couldn't help but think I should have never brought him up.

"He is technically still my husband."

"The divorce isn't final?" it was a joke, but it ricocheted through me. Something so final, I didn't think I could do that. But I didn't think I could ever forgive him.

"No but speaking of him. I'm having him look into Vincent."

"Why?"

"Well, there's something off about him."

"Already suspicious of your biological father, what did Father do to us?"

"Make us stronger."

"Alara-"he began letting out a breath, "You were strong in spite of him not because of him. Mourn him, yes but never give him the credit for your life. Your struggles, your growth."

"Wow, Theo. Maybe you're in the wrong career, ever considered being a counsellor."

"Not a chance," he laughed, "But Vincent, do you want me to look into him too?

"How did-"

"You never call me just to call me, you always want something," he chided.

"Now who's the liar," I deadpanned.

"Still you, I'll see what I can do. I'm already in hot water with the international gangs and Mafias what's being on one more person's hitlist."

"If he lays a finger on you, he won't have any left to pray with."

"Alara." His voice was firm, "Don't lose yourself. Not like me. Promise me that."

I didn't know if that were a promise I could keep.

"I promise,"

Was there even a difference between a promise and a lie?