A Switch in time

A Switch in Time.

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I see you watching me. You make a grand show out of scrolling past, but you always come back. It gives me a warm fuzzy feeling, confirming that you and I are meant to be.

I already know what you're looking for as I've done my research, even visited you while you were dreaming. Now all I have to do is bide my time and I'm good at that... but, don't take too long, you don't want to be sniped at the last minute.

Sara.

I'm a compulsive spender, don't judge me, I've just got zero willpower. A few years back it was food, used to stuff myself silly and before that it was painkillers. So I guess you could say that I have an addictive personality. But right at this moment, I'm focused on luxury items. That could be perfume, (nothing less than Cartier or Chanel), and wait for it...Dolls. I know you're no doubt thinking...dead creepy! But it really isn't. They give me comfort, like being part of a huge extended family, in a nutshell, they make me happy.

I mainly collect the antique ones, you know with the cherub faces and ringlet hair. Every expression is different and their eyes tell the story of a life long gone. I can almost see the memories floating out of them.

You're probably wondering if I'm rich or shacked up with a generous sugar daddy, well sadly the answer is no to both. I live for the moment spending, often going without food if an item really appeals. And at this moment a doll has 100% caught my eye.

She's big, around 34 inches which is huge for a Victorian doll. Her cornflower blue eyes shine out from the photos like Sapphire lights and all I'm hearing is "Buy me! Buy me!" My finger has thoughtfully hesitated because the price tag is £850. Even for me that's a bit steep, but I keep going back to her, it's like she talks to me in my sleep, hovering in the darkness above my head and I know that my willpower is wearing thin.

If you're not into dolls you'll be thinking that I'm some kind of nut, but listen to this...she has a knee-length light blue velvet dress with a darling matching little coat, both are trimmed with exquisite cream French lace. Her brown leather boots are fastened with tiny black buttons and she looks extremely pleased with herself. Almost as if she holds the biggest secret and delights in you wondering what on earth it could possibly be. Her blonde ringlets are proud and frame her face perfectly, oh, and don't get me started on the cute little teeth! I really want her.

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God, why are you still dithering? Press the button, it's only money and you can't take it with you. I'm special and you know it. Just imagine how perfect I'd look sitting in the front of your cabinet. I've chosen you and if you're not going to leap then I'm moving on to someone else. It's so dull on eBay, observing mindless faces scroll past or 'watch' my page, only to shy away when it comes to actually pressing the 'buy it' now button. I've lived with many families, but sadly have never found my forever home. No one tends to want to keep me around.

Sara.

Sod it! Another disturbed sleep, coffee then I'm going to do it. Strangely I feel as if I'm about to press a nuclear button. My gut is saying no but my heart is saying a huge yes. I need her like I need a sugar hit. Once I press buy I'll be satisfied... for the moment.

My finger hovers above and then drops like a missile. A strange heat floods through my body she's mine she's coming home. I send payment through Paypal and the seller emails to say thanks for the purchase but she will not accept returns for any reason. I find this a bit strange, I mean after paying nearly a grand why on earth would I want to return her? I lose the thought and go about my day. It's great to have something to look forward to.