Project Cosmos

Trains

The autumn breeze chilled the night as I stood on the train tracks. Darkness enveloped me, broken only by the faint headlight of an approaching train. Its sharp whistle pierced through the air, causing a haunting and mournful sound to echo off the surrounding houses and trees. Some people understood that signal to say move, I understood it to say stay and I stepped closer. 

I glanced up at the sky. The stars seemingly winking down at me. The pit of my stomach wrenched and the world around me began to spin. God, if you're up there...

"Hey, you good?" A voice asked, managing to pierce through the noise of the train and jolt me out of my thoughts. A shiver of fear ran down my spine at the prospect of it being a serial killer but maybe it was just God's always on cue, sense of humor. 

Think. Think. Think. Grandpa always said that If I was ever in a situation where I was face to face with a bear to not make any sudden movements. So, calmly, coolly, and collectedly, I replied, my back still turned to the stranger. "Yeah, I'm good. You?"

"I'm fine, but I need you to move. it'd be a shame if you died."

At that, I whipped around to face my aggressor. A teenage boy, with blond hair, tall, muscular but not too muscular. Probably my age.

"I'm not trying to kill myself," I told him, quickly glancing back at the proximity of the train.

For me, standing on the train tracks was not about ending my life, but about feeling something, anything. I didn't want to die, I wanted to live. I wanted to feel the adrenaline rush through my veins as the train approached me, and I wanted to feel the fear that comes with standing in the face of danger.

Just as the train was about to round the corner of trees, the boy stepped in front of me, blocking its light. "What are you doing?" I yelled over the shaking of the tracks, my heart pounding in my chest.

I stared into the boy's eyes, trying to read the flickering emotion all over his face "I don't want you to die," he said simply. "So, I figured that if I stepped in front of you, you would be less likely to go through with killing us."

I let out a sigh and peeked behind him at the oncoming train before grabbing his wrist and pulling us out of harm's way.

"Phew, I thought you were just going to stand there and watch us become pancakes."

I rolled my eyes and quipped back a response, "I already told you that I'm not trying to kill myself."

"For the most part, I tend to base my reasoning on the way things appear," he said matter-of-factly, throwing up his hands in defense.

"Well, I'm not suicidal, but I appreciate your concern," I tell him as I start to make my way out of the wooded area and onto the sidewalk, "What a pansy," I mutter.

"You're welcome." 

"Thanks."