A New Start || Seventeen

Chapter 75

Jeonghan walked through the door of his hotel room and let it swing shut behind him.

He flopped down onto the bed and closed his eyes.

The events from the day had seriously rattled him and his emotions were so all over the place, he couldn't exactly pinpoint how he felt. Was he angry, upset or confused. It was starting to feel like all of them.

The moment he had walked out on the stage tonight he had spotted Daena in the crowd. It should have been impossible, there were over 10,000 people in the crowd and he found her in a second.

Not to mention he didn't even know she was coming, a fact he realised pretty quickly some of the other members must have hidden from him.

He had tried his best not to look in her direction and just enjoy being on stage. It had become his favourite distraction over the course of the tour so far. But everytime he caught a glimpse of her having fun and smiling it bothered him more and more.

It hurt him to see her at all. He missed her terribly and there were days he almost picked up the phone and begged her to come back, but then he remembered that this is what she wanted and it stopped him in his tracks everytime. Seeing her happy angered him. He wasn't happy. He was devastated and he had thought she would feel the same. Until he saw her tonight and realised she was fine.

That anger had boiled up in him and he had snapped, making the decision to sing directly at her during Habit to make sure she knew he wasn't okay and he wanted her to not be okay too.

But then she had got up and just walked out, leaving him more confused than ever.

At the restaurant after he hadn't expected to see her but had found her laughing and joking with the other members only compounding his anger further.

Although, he couldn't take his eyes off her. She looked amazing. He was reminded of the reason her fell for her in the first place. She was effortlessly beautiful. From the first moment he had laid eyes on her he had been blown away and he had felt that again tonight.

However when she had started walking towards him he panicked and fled. He wasn't sure he could get through a conversation with her and honestly didn't want to hear her reasons and excuses for the situation they were in. So he left and headed straight to the hotel.

Jeonghan hadn't even been back in his room 5 minutes before someone pounded on his door.

He groaned and rolled over, hoping whoever it was would assume he was asleep and go away.

The pounding continued.

"Jeonghan, open this door" a voice yelled from the other side.

Jeonghan groaned again. Of course it was Joshua. He continued to ignore him.

"Yoon Jeonghan! If you don't open this door I'll get the front desk to give me a key" Joshua yelled.

Jeonghan sat up. He could tell from Joshua's tone he was angry and right now he wouldn't put it past him to do exactly as he said and gain access to Jeonghan's room in whatever way he could.

Jeonghan stood and crossed the room before reluctantly opening the door.

Joshua stood on the other side, his face was slightly red and his eyes were wide with anger.

Jeonghan knew this wasn't going to be fun.

He left the door open and went back the bed before sitting on it.

Joshua entered the room and closed the door behind him.

He paced back and forth at the end of the bed for a moment before speaking.

"I can't understand you at all" he snapped.

Jeonghan looked at him. "Me? What about you? You could have warned me" he snapped in response.

"Warn you?" Joshua said with a laugh.

Jeonghan sighed. He didn't have the energy to be angry. "Yes Joshua. Warn me that my ex girlfriend would be in the crowd tonight so I could prepare myself. I don't know if you realised but I'm still not entirely over her" he replied calmly.

Joshua's attitude immediately changed. Jeonghan watched as Joshua's face softened and he stopped pacing.

"I... I thought it was better if you didn't know. I thought it might be a nice surprise. I don't know" Joshua muttered.

Jeonghan titled his head. "What exactly was your plan here? To show me that she's fine and happy?" He asked.

Joshua shook his head slowly.

The room was silent for a minute before Joshua spoke.

"I thought you would see each other and realised how much you missed each other and maybe something would change" Joshua explained.

Jeonghan shook his head. "It's not that simple Joshua and anyway it didn't really seem like she has missed me all that much" He said with a sad sigh.

"You're wrong" Joshua replied suddenly.

Jeonghan snapped his head up to look directly at Joshua.

"She's been through a lot. Seeing her smile tonight was a big deal. I thought she might be broken forever Jeonghan" Joshua explained.

Jeonghan opened his mouth to reply but Joshua held up a hand to silence him.

"If you think she's fine you are wrong. I know her. Your judgement is clouded because she hurt you. But I know you are wrong. She still loves you. She wanted to talk to you tonight, she wanted to explain things. That was your oppurtunity to convince her. To bring her back to us. But you blew it because you are too stubborn to see what was staring you in the face" Joshua replied, the anger returning to his face with every word.

Jeonghan stood. "So this was your plan. To get us back together? Don't you think you should have told me. If I had known I would have done everything I could to convince her to come back, to take me back. This is as much your fault as mine" Jeonghan snapped.

Joshua looked down at the floor. "Hoshi said we should tell you. But I didn't listen. I thought it would be much better if it was a surprise, that way you wouldn't have time to overthink it. I guess I just didn't realise how hurt and angry you still are" Joshua explained.

"That's right. You should have told me." Jeonghan said as he sat back down. He placed his head in his hands. "What do we do?" He asked.

"I don't know. I think it's too late. She left just after you. She was devastated" Joshua replied.

Jeonghan lifted his head. "I have to try. Get out" he snapped.

Joshua stepped back in shock and Jeonghan's sudden change in tone. "W..What?" He stuttered.

"I said get out" Jeonghan replied simply.

"What are you going to do? Let me help you" Joshua pleaded.

"No. Get out. I'm going to fix this my way. I don't need anymore of your help" Jeonghan explained.

Joshua hesitated before walking to the door. "I'm sorry" he said before he opened the door and left.

Jeonghan pulled out his phone and dialled Daena's number, praying this time she might answer.