Ivy's Pov:
I was feeling dead inside as I stood behind the rusting old railing.
The crusty,almost dry Huntington air stung like a wasp to my bare arms.
I have had this feeling of emptiness for years now.
Almost so long that now I'm used to it.
The sudden waves of depression approached almost every week.
Being happy for a moment was like a blessing to me now.
Standing there I swung my arms recalling that night once again.
I felt a stinging pain inside my chest,as if my heart would tear through my rib cage and set itself free
To be honest,it was better than hating myself anyway.
As I sat down,my back against the cold metal pole behind me,I heard ambulance noises from the near end of the street.
The noises continued for a while taking me back to the day which made me think of the worst nightmares of my life...once again
I sat numb,holding my cold bare feet with my hands and burying my face in my blouse.
The memories..the fucking memories.
I said a silent prayer in my heart for the person inside the ambulance.
Although,I didn't believe in God anymore,I genuinely wanted the person inside the ambulance to make it out of the hospital.
The thought of him lying paralysed in the hospital,skull cracked in half and 2 fingerless arms in front of me made me hit my head to the pole with such force that I thought I survived a freak accident.
Tears drenched my blouse as I shivered with the voices inside my head.I definitely am the worst human here in this quite town of Blossomville.
Pressing my fingers into each other almost bruising my fingertips.It's been 3 years,a whole lot of time ..no one remembers except for me,which makes it worse.
As I was about to close my eyelids,my phone buzzed.
Whatsapp:
1 new message from Mum
Mum:Where are you?I want you home in 5 minutes.
Me: ok
My mom died 4 years ago,she was coming home for Christmas from Manhattan,when a loader crashed her car into a pine tree.
We got the news 2 days later,we tried calling her several times.Infact I called her 31 times that night.
My father re-married a year later and reason was that he felt "lonely and sick of no having anyone around him"
He married a 60 year old woman who was 4 years older to him,apparently because she gave him great sex and also "didn't make him feel lonely".I know my dad,he never really had a spark with my mom,they didn't suffer a bad relationship,but it was obvious that do not love each other.It had always been me,my mom and my sister.My dad didn't bother talking to us about our emotional health ever since mom passed away.
(More description about this in the next chapter)
I was shattered into pieces no one could ever fix.A hole in me that only seems to suck me inside every moment I inhale a breath, every morning I wake up.
I zip up my jacket over my blouse and start to head out of the terrace.
When I turn back,I see a dog,what looked like a corgi and had caramel-brown fur.
I have always adored dogs all my life.
I can't even imagine my world without them. They bring so much happiness, love, and meaning into my everyday life. From their wagging tails to their adorable puppy eyes, they have this magical way of making everything better. Whether I'm feeling down or just need a good cuddle, my street puppies are always there for me. They truly are my best friends, and I will forever be grateful for the joy they bring into my life.
I bend down to pet her.She sniffs me and wags her tail when I give her my hand.I see that there is a collar attached to her neck and she had a leash on her.
Her name was...OLIVE.
I try to smile and blink back the tears which would flow through any minute now.
I was about to pick her up,when I stopped.I froze.
I immediately let her slide down from my grip and stand back up.
Thats him.
Chase.The Chase Dennis who used to be my best friend.
Olive rolls her tongue out and wiggles behind Chase's legs.
He picks her up and goes out of the door to leave.. eyeing me which made me stick to my place,placing one hand on Olives collar and re-adjusting his grip on her leash.
Wait.I say to him,almost too scared to utter another word.
He doesn't stop and pats olive as if he is telling her its gonna be okay.
How are you?
He stops right outside the door,exhales a deep,what seemed like a frustrated breath.He doesn't answer and shuts the door with a loud bang which makes me jump.
I look down at my feet holding in everything it takes.
I sigh with a long breath and take out the pocked knife and morphine tablets.I place it on the ground,not wanting to take it home again.
I crush the tablets with my feet and run out the place without second thoughts.
