Gracious

Chapter 43

A/N - less than 24 hours later 🫡

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There was nothing quite like the peace and quiet I received when the twins were at school, when my other brothers were nowhere to be seen.

Give or take Prescott, who was asleep upstairs even though it was one o'clock; who knows what time he'd stayed up until last night.

I had the privilege of getting the tv to myself, a black coffee in my hands, a blanket thrown over my lap- one might say I was living my best life. When anxiety wasn't consuming me whole, anyway.

The vibrating of my phone in my pocket made me stiffen, I just prayed on everything that it wasn't the twins' school telling me Alexander was in the principal's office yet again; or worse, he hadn't even showed up. I deflated in relief when I saw Chase's name on my screen, knowing full well I hadn't heard from him for nearly two days now.

It may sound clingy to some, but needing to know my brothers were okay at almost all times was one of the only things that really kept me going nowadays.

"Chase", I placed my coffee on the table in front of me and held my phone up to my ear, "to what do I owe the pleasure?".

"You're so formal, it scares me", I could just envision him rolling his eyes as he spoke, "I need to talk to you".

"I'd assume so, if you called me", I teased, hearing a sigh on the other end instead of a chuckle, "what's wrong?".

"I don't know if I can do this", he exhaled as if a weight had been lifted off of his shoulders while saying those words aloud, "I want to come home". A frown tugged at my eyebrows, up until now I'd believed he'd been loving college, both the work and social sides of it.

"Homesickness is normal, Chase, you're bound to-,", I leaned back into the sofa and looked up at the ceiling, hating the fact that he was so far away from me.

"It's not just homesickness Zane", he cut me off and I listened, "the work, it's a lot- what if all of these people are smarter than me and I'm falling behind without even realising it?".

"You're the smartest person I know", I said truthfully, earning myself a scoff in reply, "you think I'm lying?".

"I think you're telling me what I want to hear", he sighed, "you said I never had to force myself to be here".

"And I mean it", I nodded even though he couldn't see me, "if you really don't want to be there, you want to come home, I'll have you on a flight whenever you want it".

"You mean that?", he asked quietly, I hummed back and he sighed, "I'll just be failing, letting you down if I do that".

"Letting me down is impossible Chase", I shook my head, "but I want you to think about it first. You're bound to miss us, miss Aurora, miss home, and you're also bound to doubt your ability to do the work...but that doesn't take away the fact that you're intelligent, headstrong, brilliant- and I believe with every fibre of my being that you can do this".

"I'm just being stupid", he sighed, I could picture him taking off his glasses and fiddling with them, "I'm sorry".

"None of that", I told him, "I think you should take a few mental health days, come home for a bit?".

"And if I decide I don't wanna go back?", my lips twitched into a smirk and I cleared my throat, my answer coming instantaneously.

"Then I'll take you up there to collect your things effective immediately", I smiled, "it's completely up to you". He stayed silent for a moment or two, the cogs probably turning in his head while he fiddled with his glasses.