My heart for you...

chapter 18

Y/N POV

I wake up to screaming coming from the next door. I jump up and rush to Flo's room knowing she's having another nightmare.

"Flo, wake up everything is fine. You're safe he can't hurt you anymore ", I tell her gently shaking her awake. The moment she wakes up her eyes frantically search the room not knowing where she is.
"You're safe Flo. Remember you are at my house ?", I try to ressure her.
"I'm sorry...", Flo stutters braking into tears. I pull her into a hug.
"Don't be sorry, there's nothing to be sorry for ", I tell her calmly. As I want to go back to my room, Flo stops me.
"Can you stay with me please?", she asks quietly.
"Yeah of course", I answer. She opens up the sheets and I crawl in next to her, she then snuggles up to me having my arm around her. I can feel her breathing even out and fall aslepp not long after.

Since Flo got out of hospital she nearly every night has nightmares. It´s horrible, because she has to go through it all over again. It hurts to see her this hurt.

I know she´s blaming herself for what happend but that´s because Tom told her it´s her fault. Flo now has to learn that it´s not her fault and that she isn´t responisble for what he did.

I took of the whole august so I can be there for Flo. She is ashamed of her wounds and trys to hide them with long clothing but I tell her that she doesn´t has to hide from me.

Lizzie visits us both here and there and sometimes she even brings fresh vegetables form her garden. I love her vegetables they are so much better than those from the store.

Scar also tries to come as often as possible but with the kids it´s a bit difficult. Normaly she would bring them along but Flo asked her not to. She doesn´t want Rose to see all her bruises. I can totaly understand that and Scar as well is very understanding with her wish.

On day Flo tells me she is sad that she can´t help me cook and so I bought a little stander that she can put over her legs. She now is able to cut the ingredients and can help me with the cooking. It was great to see her happier after that.

Today Flo has an appointment at the hospital to get her cast taken off after three weeks with it on her wrist. She also made crossed the appointment with the next scan for the baby.

"You ready to go?", I ask Flo sensing her nervousness.
"Yes, ready to go", she tells me nervously. I help her form the sofa into the wheelchair and then into the car.
The whole drive is silent, soft music playing. I can see the wheels turn in Flo´s head so I take her hand to let her know she´s not alone.

We arrive at the hospital and luckyly don´t have to wait long before a nurse takes us to an examination room. Flo lays down on the hospital bed. I sit next to her neither of us to nervous to talk, so I just hold her hand again.

A few minutes later Dr. Wilson comes in together with a nurse.
"Hello Florence, how have you been since we discharged you?", she asks wanting to know the truth.
"I guess okay. I have nightmares but other than that nothing majore. Morningsickness got more but Y/N is a big help, I wouldn´t come along without her", Flo honestly answers looking at me with a thankful smile. I also swear she is blushing a bit.
"That´s good to hear. I can prescribe you something against the nightmares if you want?", Dr. Wilson explains.
"I would really appreciate that, thank you", Flo tells her.
"Okay so what happens today?", I ask wanting to now what to expect.
"Well, we take off the cast today, I unfortunately have to look at your bruises Florence and then we´ll have a look at the baby", Dr. Wilson describes what´s happening today. I can fell Flo tense up at the mention of the bruising.
"Can we maybe start with checking the wounds so its over?", I ask her hoping to help Flo with this.
"No problem. Would you please take of your shirt and trousers then Florence", she asks softly.

Flo starts to undress with my help and lays back down on the hospital bed. The bruising on her body is mostly gone. There are some left on her hips and thighs. The ones on her arm and her face are no longer visible. After Dr. Wilson finishes her examination I help Flo to put her clothes back on.

"So Florence, the bruises have healed very well, the ones left should go within the next week. We would now take off you cast and give you a splint that you should wear a week. After that you only need the wheelchair if you want to but you can start using crutches as well", she explains sounding proud of Flo.

I can see the smile on Flo´s face telling me that she is relieved to be able to move more on her own.

"Should we take a look at the baby now?", Dr. Wilson asks smiling at us.
"Yes please", Flo answers slightly anxious.

Dr. Wilson gets the ultrasound machine and puts the gel on Flo´s belly. I´m still holding her hand probably as nervous as she is. We can see the still very little dot on the screen and a smile creeps on both of our faces.
"Everything looks fine, it´s still to early to hear a hearbeat but by the look of it the baby is developing very good", she tells us.

Flo hugs me tightly. When I pull away we look us deep in the eyes. There is an unknown tesion between us. All I want to do is to kiss her, show her how much I still love her, but that wouldn´t be right.

"I want to see you in the 11th or 12th week of pregnancy again for another scan. We can do the checkup for the knee then aswell", Dr. Wilson interrupts us.
"Thank you Dr. Wilson", we tell her both.

Scar finally came over together with the kids. Rose was very careful not to hurt Flo, she even brought her some paintings she did and showed her all she learned in school.

It was cute seeing her interact with Rose. In that moment I knew Flo will be the best mom a child could wish for, well I knew that before but this just confirmed it.

The days went on, Flo and I spend every free minute with eachother eventhough we have the opportunity to leave room for the otherone. Flo even asks me to go to her apartment with her so she can grab some more clothes and some other stuff she needs, while staying at mine.

It is horrible seeing all the shattered furniture. I find the pregnancy test and carefully pick it up giving it to Flo. She hugs me very tightly and it is the second time we nearly kissed, pulling away unsure both of us blushing.

My feelings for her grow stronger and stronger. I´m not sure if I should talk to her about it and figure it most likely will still be to early.

At the end of august I unfortunately have to go back to work. Since Flo still isn´t able to film we continue filming and reshooting the scenes where her presence isn´t needed.

During work my mind is always at Flo, wondering if everything is fine and if she has everything she needs till I get back. Scar even calls me out for not beeing concentrated and asks me when Flo and I would make our relationship official. I am flustered by her question and tell her that we aren´t together and that Flo just came out of an toxic engagement. Scar just rolls her eyes and sarcastically tells me that she´s believing what I told her.

I love Flo´s company and beeing around her every day. With her everything feels easy. It is as if the world belongs just to the two of us. It doesn´t matter what everyone else says or thinks because it´s just us. I love her snuggles, her soft snores while she slepps. I love the way she looks at me. I love our daily cuddles. I love if we fall asleep together. I love our chats and the way it never gets boring to talk with her. I love how the tip of her tounge is on her lips when she thinks about something. I love the way she talks about her family and all her childhood adventures. I love her passion for cooking and arts. I love how she never lost hope. I love her strength, her beauty, her comfort. I love the way she makes me feel.

God damm, I LOVE HER!!!