College U (Male Reader X Aespa Winter)

Chapter 69

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"You what now Y/N?"

Karina inquired, perplexed by the words you just spoke. She wanted to question herself if she was in limbo or if her brain was still asleep since she couldn't believe what had happened. She felt drowsy even though the sun was already beginning to rise. Giselle's eyes and mouth widened in shock as she comprehended the significance of your choice.

Everyone could tell that the silence in the room was loud and it weight heavy on everyone yet Winter held your hand supporting your Choice.

"Y/N, Listen bro, I understand you love Minjeong but can't you just date privately? I mean it's good for her career and-"

"Unnie, As much as I love to have the fame and recognization I get, the pain not being able to have Y/N by my side or know that he's gone in my life weights more heavier. I thought I could be happy like I used to be without him but, I realized that the times I truly felt happy was when I was with him. To me Happiness is being with him"

Winter smiled at you as you smiled back. Giselle was about to say something more when Karina stopped her. She gave Giselle an understanding look to which she was familiar with. Karina's leader mode was seen on her face as You noticed the different look Karina was giving you. It was a sharp and unreadable.

"So why do you think you should tell the CEO that your dating her? When you left her like a mess a year ago."

"Unnie!"

Karina glared angrily at Minjeong, and no explanation was necessary for her conduct. As soon as Winter realized that the Karina standing in front of her was not the amiable Karina, but rather the Big sister and group leader who was strict and compassionate, she quickly stopped talking. Winter's only option was to droop her head and let Karina lead the conversation. On the other side, you were ready for this from her. Despite welcoming you back into their group, Karina was still hesitant to fully trust you because she had seen how badly you treated one of their members.

If you were in Karina's shoes, you would have been astounded at how she was able to control her emotions toward you. You might even have thrown a punch at yourself or simply stopped existing altogether. Looking back, you realize that Karina's kindness has always been more for the benefit of others around her than for herself, and you feel stupid for ever betraying her confidence in you since you hurt the individuals she believed to be her sisters and family. You also don't fuck with relatives.

Taking a deep breath your eyes stared back at Karina showing now brave front or any smug or happiness look, you gave her a look of assurance and determination.

"On the actions that I did, I have no reason and I don't mind you all having grudges with me still even if your not showing it. I understand it completely. I was consumed by my own doubts and that killed me immediately as my life after that was more miserable than my life before. The countless sleeps I get remembering the scene of seeing Min alone as I leave, that haunted me for so many nights as I deserve it completely. I know i deserve nothing but pain for what I did. "

Your words wasn't coming out of your brain but from your heart. If Winter was devastated, then what about your side? Weren't you devastated as well? But since your the one who decided to do it, the sadness and pain doubled on you as slowly, you lost yourself and at some point during that time, You completely didn't know what to do. Your life back then was simply wake up, eat, take a shower, work, go home,  sleep and repeat. It was that repeating cycle over and over again and it was boring and painful because you were silently suffering and carrying the weights of your decision.