Back to our Love

1

"Hey, Benjamin," Miranda greeted taking a seat. She sat her purse down and looked him over.

Staring down at her ring, she held it out in front of Ben although he couldn't see it.

"Calvin proposed...I was happy for the moment but then I thought about you and how shocked I was when you proposed but was elated and happy." She voiced with a light smile.

"The thing is I would have to divorce you in order to marry him and I don't know if I want to do that. Divorcing you means letting you go and I can't do that yet. I could still pay for your care. It wouldn't be under my insurance anymore after the divorce. Technically you're alive so you're insurance would work too but if that runs out I would pay for it. I promise." Miranda told him rubbing his hand.

"Then again I don't know if I even want to get married again. That would be three marriages. I did not plan for this. I hate this. I told him yes though. He makes me happy Ben. I wasn't happy for a long time. He's not you but he's a runner up and I think I love him" Miranda felt the tears welding up in her eyes. She didn't think she would ever get over this. Over him.

"I mean I tell him I love him frequently and he loves me. He's the sweetest. It's been years and it still feels so awkward telling you this. I just feel like I'm cheating but I know you would be happy for me. You would want me to move on and be happy and experience a new love....right? I know, I know, we were happy. God, we were so happy. I hate that this happened to you and to us."

6 years ago
Miranda woke up and looked over at the empty spot in the bed. She really did miss Ben getting into bed with her. Every time she thought about hugging, kissing, or touching him, her mind wouldn't let her go there.

She was just so disappointed and frustrated with him. Being his boss made things that much harder. They agreed on church and state and yet neither one of them separated the two at home. He slept in the living room and they barely ate dinner together.

Getting dressed for today, she straightened her hair and bang. She put on her earrings and necklace. She grabbed a dress for Owen's and Amelia's wedding and walked out to the living room.

Ben was just getting up. The two didn't even greet each other.

"Hey Uh, do you want to go over together?" Ben asked folding the covers from the couch.

"Go over where?" Miranda asked zipping her dress up in the garment bag.

"To the wedding. Do you want to drive over together, or--

"Well, at this point, I don't even know if I'm going. Uh, Trauma's strapped for surgeons and residents." She responded zipping up her garment bag. "Blake is gone. Wilson's off.

"You could always put me back in." Ben returned shrugging.

"Don't." She stressed, opening her makeup bag.

"Yeah, I know, I know. Still, if you're shorthanded, mm just makes sense."

"Ugh, good Lord. You're just like Tuck. I tell you no-- you keep pushing and pushing. Like it's gonna change my mind." She stressed.

"You don't think 4 months is long enough for me to learn my lesson?"

"On a 6-month suspension. No, I don't. If you think a scheduling glitch will suddenly make me trust you again in an O.R--

"Wait. Trust me. What do you mean trust me"?" Ben questioned confused.

Miranda stared at him a few moments before sighing as she made her way to the door. She honestly never meant to say she didn't trust him out loud.