it's all futile

5

trigger warnings listed in first part

☆

wilbur looks over at two knocks on his door, peering up from over the top of his phone. "yeah?"

his door pushes open and his dad steps in, smiling at the brunette in bed. "your aunt's on the phone," he says, gesturing to the house phone in his hand, "she wanted to say hi."

wilbur has many aunts, but he already knows it will be her. he has no explanation for why he would say no to the offer, not without lying, so he just nods before sitting up slightly as the phone is passed to him. he forgets about the game he was playing, trying to swallow down the tightness in his throat.

his aunt greets him through the phone right as his dad says, "i'm going to make sure tommy brushes his teeth, give me two mins."

wilbur feels like he's just been dunked under ice-cold water, watching as his dad leaves him alone with the woman on the phone. he swallows, trying to push down his anxiety, and replies, "hi."

his voice breaks, high and embarrassing.

she laughs lightly at him through the phone, which makes him feel like he's going to projectile vomit over his bedsheets. "you sound excited to see me."

wilbur prays that she is being sarcastic, rather than her genuinely mistaking his fear as excitement. he tries to reply with something casual, just in case his dad can hear that he isn't talking, but he can't seem to conjure up any words.

"guess what i'm doing, wil."

wilbur doesn't want to know. he doesn't care. there is nothing she could be doing that would interest him, unless it was moving far, far away and promising never to contact their family again. except, he wouldn't even want that, because his dad would surely be sad to lose the woman he has seen as a sister for the last twenty-plus years. "what?"

she hums, and it sounds wrong. it sounds like a private sound, in a way, but wilbur thinks maybe that's just his scared mind making things up because he hates her so much. she could donate her life earnings to charity and he would find a way to interpret it as bad. he is a pessimist.

he hates himself.

"have you got your phone?"

wilbur doesn't need to answer because the device buzzes against the sheets nonetheless. it's a whatsapp message, which makes sense considering wilbur has never given her an alternate method of contacting him. she must have gotten his number from their wider-family group chat.

he says nothing to the older woman as he picks up his phone, still holding the landline to his ear.

one thing about wilbur's aunt is that she has never done anything to wilbur that leaves evidence. everything happens in person and her touches never leave marks. she's safe with it, discreet, and that's just another one of the many reasons he knows he could never tell anyone.

who in their right mind would believe a mentally ill, attention-seeking teenager over a well-respected, people-loving adult woman?

that's why wilbur is so shocked by the message that loads on his screen. the image.

his heart dies. there's no way it continues to beat.