Predestined

15. Darkness and emptiness.

Ashton's POV

The dark clouds had started to cover the skies in a thick mask. The threats of a heavy downpour scared the shop owners away, letting them close their shops in a hurry. The smell of rain lingered in the air as Ashton's guard drove fast to the hospital.

The dark weather matched Ashton's gloomy mood and in a way, he was grateful it wasn't all butterflies and unicorns. He was emotionally and physically exhausted but he had to see Rani.

The drive to the hospital was slow and quiet as Ashton stared out of the window, watching the people on the streets run helter-skelter for shelter from the incoming storm the news reporters warned about.

Ashton ambled into the hospital with his guards behind him, with his dark shades on and a new black hoodie he picked from the back of their car.

The family's eyes were fixed on him and he nodded politely at them before declining into his seat. His guards took their positions behind him, standing. A familiar pair of eyes on his caught his attention and he rose to his feet, tilting his head slightly to draw the attention of Rani's best friend who had just joined the family straight from work.

The petite woman followed him to the cafeteria and took a seat opposite him, a sad smile plastered on her face.

"Thanks for being there for her.", she mumbled quietly but Ashton nodded and stared at her frail body. She had lost a lot of weight but her baggy choice of clothes concealed it. He had been in that stage so he understood her.

They had one thing in common. Having the fear of losing their loved one. She had been in shock and blamed herself for the accident. She was a strong woman but she had broken down in front of everyone a lot of times, especially when a doctor came out of Rani's room without the good news everyone was anticipating.

"Did you take the video?", her voice was low and shaky. Ashton shook his head in reply, with a straight face.

"Then who did? Someone from your company? I want to trust that you don't have a hand in it.", she cried.

For the first time, Ashton spoke. "I want to find the person too. And if I do, I will let you know."

He took her soft hands in his and squeezed them as he assured her. He was certainly going to find the person but now, all he craved was for Rani to look him in the eye and smile at him.

He felt Grace's stare burn the back of his hands. Her small fingers traced the red bruises that stained his hands from beating Gregory, making him flinch. The pain from the bruises stung as she touched it but he clenched his teeth and continued to stare at the woman in front of him.

"Did you call the police after beating him up? Or the ambulance?", Grace interrogated.

"Police.", he responded simply.

Grace's phone rang, distracting them from their little pep talk. She pulled her hand away from his and inhaled sharply before answering the phone, an expectant expression covering her face.

"She's awake??", Grace shrieked and shot up from her seat like she had been sitting on a sack of needles. "I'm coming right up."

"It's not your fault she had an accident. I'll make sure that bummer serves the sentence he deserves.", Ashton reassured and led the way back to meet the family.

Rani's mother and aunts were in the room with her, talking loudly and smiling broadly. Ashton stood behind the windows and peered at the room filled with different kinds of well-wishing flowers and the women giggling. And at her.

The woman who had him sleeping on the uncomfortable bench in the hospital. Had him beating up the man who caused her to be in that state and had him very worried and scared she might not make it. He has started his bad smoking habit again.

Rani's head was still covered in thick layers of bandage and her arm was in a cast. A faint smile covered her face as she enjoyed the sight of her aunts fighting over her.

A warm hand rested on Ashton's shoulder and he whipped his head to see who touched him. Grace's soft features met his gaze and he offered her an apologetic smile, turning to face her.

"You're a good friend. Please take care of her."

Ashton gave Rani one last glance through the open windows and took painful steps away. He wasn't ready to see her but it was utterly relieving that she survived. He knew she blamed him for everything and until he reached the bottom of it, he wasn't going to talk to her. He had not for once proved himself right but he was willing to make her believe he didn't have a hand in whatever leak was going around. If their kiss was a joke to him, it wouldn't have been ingrained in his mind how her cheeks flushed and how she accepted the kiss and allowed it to happen.

His guards followed him to the car park and soon after, they had hit the road. The rain started to pelt the car windscreen in small drops. The streets were empty and all the shops had closed. The road was littered with a few cars and stopping at the red light pissed Ashton off more than he usually would've.

If Rani had walked fast, would she have still been hit? Was thinking about the possibility of losing her job to scare her into walking into a busy street? Or it was the stigmatization.

He took a long drag of the lighted cigarette in his hand and shut his eyes as the smoke filled his lungs.

"Your next appointment to see the therapist is this afternoon, Ash. You going?", Jerry, his guard questioned, staring at him with a worried look.

Ashton shook his head and looked away, his apartment building coming into full view. The car came to a halt and Ashton unlocked the door, rushing out of the car without looking back.

He headed for the front door and typed in his key code letting the automatic door swing open. He looked around to see the floors and the rooms tidy. The chandelier gleamed and the wall artefacts glimmered as he switched on the light.

His head pounded and his eyes were bloodshot for lack of sleep. His knuckles were bruised and bleeding. The dark bags under his eyes had darkened more over the days and he was in desperate need of a long shower since he spent over a week on the bench in the hospital. All his body ached from the discomfort but it didn't matter anymore because Rani had come back to life. He took off his clothes and strolled into the modern shower, letting the cold water hit his skin.

He couldn't name the relationship he had with her but one thing he knew, he didn't want to lose her. Thinking about her helped him. He didn't drive himself into hallucinations even though he still couldn't sleep.

He has promised Grace to find the truth behind the leaked video before he would have the courage to look Rani in the eye. He desperately wanted to apologize and make her believe him. The rumours about him died down after the leak but his fans loved to feast on Rani. No matter how much they deleted the hateful comments, the effects of it still lingered. They made her feel less of herself. Called her names of what she wasn't and he wasn't even able to defend her. He hadn't forgotten about calling her names either.

He worried about her. What was her boss thinking about her having private relations with her client in the course of her contract? If he didn't kiss her, it wouldn't have come down to this. He couldn't change from being selfish. He was doing it again. Putting himself and his selfish desires first, putting her job, her reputation and her health at risk. For another reason, he hated himself.

Ashton shut his eyes and groaned in pain. The water streamed down his body and disappeared into the drain. His body continued to ache and his legs were giving up on him. He lowered himself and sat on the clean tiled floor, letting the water hit him.

Burying his face in his palms, he fought the tears that brimmed his eyes. His stomach twisted in knots as the hollowness gnawed at him. He allowed himself to wallow in the pain that his actions had caused him.

His therapy journey was slow and relieving. His therapist had called it progress but could he? The fear he felt when he saw her body lying helpless on the road. The videos were being taken as she struggled to breathe. The leg sprain. The blood that she wallowed in. The pain that runs through her body. It was all his fault. He allowed the hot tears to flow, mixing with the cold water that had continued to wash over him.

He didn't care about getting sick. It wasn't enough compensation for half the things she went through for his sake. The things he put her through. He just sat and wallowed in the emptiness and darkness that engulfed him.