Pain.
All I felt was pain.
I smelled the lighter fluid.
Heard the match strike.
Too late I realized what he was doing.
I wake up in the hospital, bandages covering my torso, my mom taking to the police outside the room. I had more than enough reason to believe my dad had been arrested already. Tonight was the night when I snapped. Broke. That week, I got arrested twice for shoplifting stupid shit. Candy bars and gum. The only way I could possibly have any fun any more was doing things I knew I shouldn't.
The Following Week.....
"Why? Why are you doing this? Its not fair to your sister to grow up with a criminal. You CHOKED a kid. That's a CRIME. Why the fuck did you do this?!" My mom tried screaming at me, but I tuned her out. "Fuck off!" I yelled after about 10 minutes of lecturing. I knew what I was doing was wrong, but I didn't know why I was doing it. It seemed like i didn't care about anything. But I was just trying to make sense of the world now. The burns on my stomach started to hurt again when I walked off, but I ignored it. It didn't matter to anyone else.
The first day of school, 4 days later..
Everyone in class is staring at me. Like I'm a monster or something. All but one.
Shay.
Shay was a quiet girl, but I thought she was hot.
She was the only one to look at me and smile. I thought to myself,"maybe I should try to sit with her at lunch today," but I knew she would say no. But if that was the worst thing I would have said to me, I wouldn't have these burns. So I tried it.
"Can I sit with you?" I asked shyly
"Um, okay" said shay, staring at me through her glasses,"Why?" "I just thought I'd try to have a friend. Sorry.... I'll go" I stood up to leave. "No its okay, stay please." "Are you sure?" "Completely." "Okay."
I sat down and watched her eat her lunch, sent from home. "Do you not have a lunch? Or money to buy one?" She looked at ne, concerned. "No... We can't afford lunch, so I just eat what I get at home." She handed me half of her sandwich "Eat. Now" "No. That's your food. Eat it. I'll be fine" she still held the sandwich in her hand for me "eat. Please?" I wearily took the sandwich. "Why?"I asked. " I said so. Do it" I ate the turkey and cheese sandwich, being satisfied with what I was given
Heading to fifth period...
"Hey um shay, I have a question." "What is it kyle?" She replied. "Do you want to um maybe hang out sometime?" There was a little pause "duh! Sorry but I got to go. See you then" she kissed me on the cheek quickly, then walked off.
The rest of that day was a blur. All I could think about was shay, her beautiful brown-blonde hair and her amazing blue eyes."Mr. Harrison, pay attention. Now what was the answer to my question for you?" My mouth went dry and my heart beat faster, then I managed to croak out, "what was the question again, Mrs smith?" The whole class laughed at me. "How many skin cells do humans lose a day?" I sat there, stupified. "Uhh, a million?" Everyone laughed again. "Try 30, 000." I cursed under my breath as the bell rang, finally releasing me from this stupid prison, and I walked slowly to my bus.
"Hey tiger" shay said as she walked up beside me "want to come over this evening? My parents and I are having cheeseburgers for dinner if you'd like to stay for them." I stood there a second, shocked. "As long as I'm not getting in the way. But shay, you know I've been arrested before right? And won't your parents not like tha-" "I don't care what they don't like. You're perfectly okay. So yes or no?" "Yes." "Well then, walk me home" she giggled a little, then took my hand while we started to walk.
At shays house...
"Mom, dad, I'm home. And I brought a friend with me" she strutted to the kitchen, me following her like a lost puppy "mom, this is Kyle. Is it okay if he stays for dinner?" Her Mon replied in a nice tone "why certainly dear. Just as long as you don't close your door" she winked at me and shay before going back to cooking. "Have fun, but not too much of it" her mom said as shay led me to her room. "What do you want to do?" I paused wearily "its up to you, I'm satisfied as long as I'm with you." She batted her eyes shyly want to ask each other a question at a time? And you have to answer honestly" I nodded yes, and then she began."what's your parents like?" I fought back tears "my mom works at the textile plant south of the city, and my dad is in jail. My turn?'' She nodded. " mhm" what's the worst thing you've ever done?" She thought a second, then said"in third grade, I stole Kimi Hopkins' chocolate bar then ate it. My turn?" I nodded wearily. "While is your dad in jail?" I mustered up all of my strength, and silently lifted up my shirt, showing her the burn scars covering my chest, stomach, and back. "Oh my god kyle, what did he do?!" She exclaimed. "Exactly what it looks like." I started to silently cry when she hugged me tightly. "Its over now, he can't hurt you anymore. No one can with me near you. I promise" I sat down on her bed and tried to stop crying. She hugged me again and kissed my forehead. "I promise" she whispered in my ear while she was holding me.
That night when I got home, she was all I could think about. Her hair. Her perfume. Her eyes. The way it felt when she held me. She had just became the center of my world, and the first person to actually care about me since god knows when. And I loved it all.
