There was a shop on Ace Attorney Street with a peculiar name: "Naf's Antique Bags". It had an ordinary storefront, of glass-paned exterior, beyond which lay various bags on display and dark wood outlines which held the glass body. Due to its modest size, one might wave it off as a shop of no significance, or judge its wares to be commonplace, however only a few know that this strangely named shop sells the best quality handbags at the most affordable prices.
But even though that is the case, its clientèle was few in number. On most days, it has no customers at all. Even if it did get customers, they were familiar faces. The returning customers. As for new customers? Those were rare. It would be a surprise if a new customer opened the doors of this shop even once a month. It is a mystery how the shop hasn't closed yet.
However, today was such a rare day. A new customer stood at the entrance of this shop.
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TING-TING!
The shop bell rang gently as the new customer entered. The customer was a woman with long black hair. Her attire consisted of a Boonie hat, black sunglasses, a short-sleeved black tee with inner maroon sleeves and bell-bottom black pants. A queer attire to don on a hot summer day, but only queer sort enter this strange shop.
As the door flung shut, the various noises inside amplified. An electric pedestal fan sat in one corner of the room, buzzing and oscillating from one side to the other, generating a cool wind. Shelves were lined up against the walls, holding various kinds of bags. When shelves weren't enough, the merchandise was piled on the floor haphazardly. Save for the little space in the middle of the room, the rest was filled with bags and boxes. On the far end of the room, opposite the door, was the counter.
"Welcome..." A languid voice greeted the customer.
Tracing the source of the voice, the woman saw there was a man behind the counter. He wore a green shirt, khaki pants and had neatly combed hair. He was lean, but not unhealthily so. But right now, looking at him sucked the life out of anyone. He slouched on his chair, hands hanging lifelessly. His vacant eyes stared at the ceiling.
He was the store owner, Naf.
The woman approached the counter. Naf turned his head towards her and asked—"How may I help you?"—in a tone that suggested he didn't want to help.
The woman was unbothered.
"So you know I was watching Eddsworld. So in the episode Tom—gosh I love him, what a hunk! I want someone to grimace at me like Tom grimaces at everyone with those abyssal pits of eyes and ravage me—uh, anyway. So Tom—oh speaking of that I read a Tom Holland fanfic where he has sex with Sonic. It was HOT. So hot I nearly died from heatstroke—anyway..."
...What? Naf stood (or sat) stunned. Who is this woman, why is this woman and what is she waffling about? He heard many words, but he couldn't comprehend what was said. However, paying no mind to Naf's gradual descent into confusion-induced mania, the woman continued.
"...anyway so Tom found a bag in Edd's Wunderkammer. It was a black backpack with Eddsworld characters printed on it. It looked SEXY—no I mean HOT, no I mean DELICIOUS—I mean cute."
If I sell five bags a week, and each bag is the price of two bobas, how many bobas do I need to sell five bags a day? Boba boba boba boba... Naf's brain has activated the defence mechanism against bullshit and has tuned out. His eyes glazed over as the woman's nonsensical rambling was reduced to background noise, a mere static to his grand ambitions of overdosing on Boba Tea. The woman continued even so. She was far too absorbed in her own world to notice anything around her.
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RomanceA fic that may or may not be smut about Jackie and Gui low effort fic, don't take seriously discord stuff