He says he doesn't understand what I see in him,
as if he's some type of insignificant creature.
Acting as if he's the most shallow person alive,
and consistently saying he is a hideous being.
He doesn't walk around with any pride,
and if he had any,
the only pride he had would be the knowledge of rolling a blunt.
He slouches his back while he gazes around the room
looking for another girl he could maybe fuck.
Never make love because he's known heartbreak for too much of his life.
Like the time his daddy passed away
Tears fell for the first time as he watched his best friend lay in the hospital bed unconscious.
He learned that happy endings don't ever happen in life,
so he rolls himself another joint
Just so he can imagine himself sitting in the clouds with his father.
Lowering himself down from his dreams,
he looks me in the eye and repeats,
"I don't know what you see in me."
My mind is going blank,
but my heart knows exactly what to say.
Slowly closing my eyes,
voice shaking slightly,
I somehow manage to form the words:
"I've been observant of you.
I see your habits, and I'm learning your thoughts.
Please don't call me a freak, I promise you I'm not.
You are not dumb, nor are you ugly.
I see the way you care.
The way you always hold the door open for anybody,
and until the last person's out,
even if that means you're going to be late for something.
I see the way you love your little niece.
How you wrap your hand around her thin blond hair,
and pull her into you.
You hug her like she's all you have.
I see hope in you.
I know you're struggling, and I,
a complete virgin when it comes to all that you've been through,
have no room to judge
Only to hope I can help you make it through the unbearable days,
and shed tears with you when you've made it past all the
Drugs
Deaths
Probation
and wars with yourself.
You are more than what you come off as.
You are a delicate human being, with such a beautiful purpose in this life.
You're more than alcohol, heroine, and cocaine."
I reunite with his gorgeous eyes
nervous and unaware of what I seem to him.
- Connor, you're a wonderful person. I adore you.
